jc4ever40

Friends please pray for me....

2008-10-27T21:17:00.002-04:00

Hi my friends.... I am going through a hard time... I am being stupid and doing stupid things...It is an easier way to "cope" with things, but I don't like to do this either.... i really don't know what and why I do this... I don't really want to say what it is that is going on... Please just pray... Please keep praying that I get a full time job as well!! I am in the process of filling out an application. It is another nursing home/assisted living center. I am not really sure what the position would entail... when I find out more info I will post it... btw. I am really sorry I haven't posted in a long time... have been busy and haven't had time to blog... i still read your blogs just about everyday though!! this is going to be a short post b/c I can't think of anything to blog about right now... love ya!!

GOOOOOOO PHILLIES!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Hanging in there...

2008-08-16T14:59:00.005-04:00

I am just hanging in there... some days are a lot better than others as usual.. The beginning of this week wasn't that great... Then Thursday and Friday were pretty good. Thursday I think was better than Friday!

I don't know if any of you have heard of Greg Laurie?? He is an evangalist from CA and he does crusades around the US. Well he is coming Oct. 3-5 in Philadelphia for a crusade and my church is one of the host churches. For the next 2 Thursday's (and then one that just passed) we are having Impact classes where we will be trained to be counselors for the event!!! We got an Impact booklet thing and in it was the blue sheet of paper that had memory verses on it. One of the verses was Psalm 139 (which I really like) and I had read it somewhere earlier and then I read it somewhere else later and so I was like God what are ya telling me?! Oh and here is another thing!! I was journaling at 12:30 this morning and which verse do you think was written on the side?!?! Yeah, you got Psalm 139!!! So I am going to try and memorize that!!! Probably not some of it but most of it!!

So yeah, I have had a pretty good past couple of days... with a little struggles here and there... Oh and I am trying to not think so negatively about myself... so pretty much I am trying to love myself the way others love me especially God! So if you could please pray for me about that!! God is definitely working in me this year... some really hard things and some that just have to be taken care of....

If you think of it can you also please pray for me... I have a job interview for a FT position on Thursday around 3ish.... It is for a daycare and I am kind of excited and nervous... My friend works there and I had filled out the application liek 2-3 weeks ago and I hadn't heard anything about it. Then this past Tuesday my friend had told me that they got my application and she talked to her boss and told her about me and so she looked at my info and called me!!! So I have an appt this Thursday!!!

Well, I can't think of anything else right now!! Hope everyone is doing well!!! Have a great weekend!! Love ya all!!!

blah...

2008-08-01T12:20:00.002-04:00

That is my mood..... I am obviously not doing the best.... thats ok... I am just trying to get through everything... So if you could and wouldn't mind praying for me I would appreciate that!! Work has been sooo boring lately.... I have been just sitting around and not really doing that much...I have been really tired lately... I am planning on just hanging out and not doing much on Saturday!!! I am going to sleep in and do laundry... just hang around the house... ahhh can't wait!!!! I am really looking forward to this.... I haven't been able to just really hang out in probably 2 weeks... so yeah it will be nice and much needed!!

**i had to stop writing for awhile since I was at work and all! Didn't have time to come back to it until 11:45pm. Anyway, tonight has not been a good night.... I had to work 12 hours today... too long and I had like no energy to work tonight... very unusual for me!! I usually have a lot of "pent up" energy... I don't know why I didn't have any... I wasn't really feeling that well tonight... Obviously that doesn't help much... My past week has been kind of insanely crazy... especially Monday.... I took off from work to clean a house that I am house sitting and cat sitting in.... I cleaned until 11:30 pm... and then woke up Tuesday and did a few things before going to work (9-2:30)and then worked 3-6 and then had bible study at 6pm-9:30 and I was EXHAUSTED!!! I could hardly keep my eyes open while we watched a movie and then driving home was a pain... got stuck in traffic not even 2 minutes down the road from where I am staying!! They were doing road work... (repaving) oh and did I mention this happened TWICE to me?!?!!? On Wednesday night as well!!!!! I was not very happy!!! They are done doing that road now one of the major roads is blocked off tonight till maybe this whole weekend I don't really know, is shut down to do road work and that road has had one lane for probably 2 weeks if not more!! argh!! they always have to do many roads at the same time... argh!!!

Back to the end of the week though.... Tonight was not a great night... I kept feeling dizzy a little bit here and there... and I was drained and am really tired... which speaking of that I probably should go to bed soon ;) considering it is almost midnight!!! shesh!!! please pray for peace of mind and that I can learn how to love myself as God loves me and my friends... ANd that I give myself more time for me... instead of going and going and going until I burn out... Pray that I don't/wouldn't do anything stupid to myself... and pray I won't/don't isolate myself... I have a tendency to do this! Well, Ok I need to get to bed... I am really tired!! Good night.... happy August 2nd!!!! Have a great weekend!!

not a lot is new...

2008-07-25T10:31:00.002-04:00

Not too much is new... still feeling the same way... a little less than usual... so that is good I guess. all that I can do is just keep going... even though all that I want to do is call it quits at times... I do not think that I would be able to do that!

I had the WEIRDEST phone call ever this week at work!!!!!! So I picked up the phone and the guy on the other end was like "Is Gumby there?" And I was like um.. excuse me? And then the guy just hangs up... I was like um ok... It was funny though and I just had to laugh about!!!

Back to regular things... I am just hanging in their... and just trying to keep on going on... Even though it can be hard... I am trying to surround myself with friends and all... and keep my mind busy from thinking negatively except my counselor is having me journal the accusations which make me have to think of them and then write them down... so yeah... which might not be such a bad thing... who knows.. I had to stop writing them last night b/c I was to much about them and my mind was wrapped up in it. So if you could pray for me that I don't dwell on them and that I am able to just give it to God and not keep dwelling in them! That would be great.. thanks :) Although I am still in this really rough time in my life, I think I can kind of see a little bit of the "light" through the tunnel so to speak... it is very dim.... But that is a good sign... I am realizing that I really am not alone and there are many people going through things that I am going through or have gone through it and they are healed from it... I feel that God wanted me to go through this struggle to help others once I am healed... Actually I can still help them now... with a smile or hug or just being there for them... sometimes that is just what they need and not to really have to talk about their struggles...

I have this verse that is on a sticky note right on my computer at work and I really like it and I am going to share it "Count it all joy, my brothers (and sisters), whenever you face trials of many kinds, for the testing of your faith develops perserverance." James 1:2-3. This actually kind of ties into what I was just writing about... in a way it does but not directly... And I have a quote from Sheila Walsh.. I think from a book but not sure!! It says "The quieter the secret, the stronger the hold it has on us." How very true!! It is sad but true..

I am obviously doing ok at the moment or I don't think I could even being writing a lot about everything... Well, I hope you have a great weekend!!! I shall try to update more frequently... Love to all my beautiful friends!!!

not doing so well today...

2008-07-11T14:02:00.002-04:00

Please pray for me. I am not doing well today! I have been so distracted today. And I don't feel like doing that much or anything... I am really tired also.... I got 7.5if not a little more hours of sleep last night. And I am really tired still... Oh well.. Somethings never change! I just don't even want to do anything... I am so I don't know.. blah! That is my mood. I had to come back to this and write more when I had time to do this. I don't why I am so down lately... I can't really shake it either. I don't know whats going on anymore... i have to work all stinkin night too and I really don't feel like it either! Oh well!! I don't even know what to say or anything anymore... i feel as if know one really listens or really cares... they just nod there head and say things like oh yeah I understand what you are going through and stuff like this.... Well, I hate to say it, but no you don't.. not unless you have gone through this will you really understand!! It is really frustrating when you know that they have not felt this way and they say oh I am sorry your feeling this way and I know what you are going through... I know that some people do actually know what I am going through and I know they have gone through something similar. I want to and need to change some of my habits. I am trying to start exercising more and eating healthier which is hard.. but I am trying... I am going to go get started working and stuff.... have a great weekend!!

rambles....

2008-07-08T15:19:00.003-04:00

This post is going to be a bunch of rambles... I am just trying to take one step, one day at a time. I keep falling flat on my face it seems. I am not proud of the things that I have done or rather that my state of mind has "made" me do. I am struggling, but I will eventually get better. I just gotta keep my eye focused on God and He will get me through this mess. As hard as that is... I am trying!! The way I look at this is I might be going through this time in my life to help another girl who may even be older then me but to just help them and walk beside them along the way. And to help them the way people have helped me. I have never quit anything and I feel like I want to quit, but I won't and can't let myself do that. I guess I am stubborn in some ways :) Who would have thought?! Although I don't have a lot of people reading this, that is ok and I am fine with it... I like to write my thoughts and feelings out... It is the healthiest way to deal with things... instead of the things I have been doing... A lot of times I am forcing myself to do things to keep myself busy... which in some ways is not a bad thing! Please continue to pray for me. That is if anyone is even reading this.... I have a lot that I am trying to work on right now and it is at times overwhelming.. But I am trying to hang in there... At least I am doing all the right things... seeing a counselor, journaling, talking to people, etc. Well, until the next time I blog.. I hope you all have a wonderful week!!

so yeaah...

2008-06-17T12:10:00.002-04:00

I am actually updating my blog in a pretty good amount of time... things are ok... not doing that best but hey whatever... I am not complaining... the Lord will use this time in my life in some way for good... I may not know why or in what way for a while... but He will... At least I am learning things about myself and all... it may not be fast but I am learning! And recognizing things that I haven't noticed before... I think I am blogging for my peace of mind and to get things out kind of.. if ya know what i mean... it is a lot easier sometimes writing or typing than talking to people... i feel really lonely today and i want to talk to someone but cant... oh well.. guess i cant always be able to talk to someone when i am not doing well. I am just going to have to realize this.. and be ok with it... that is going to be the hard part... I need to learn to look to God more and rely on Him.. He is the only one who can be there for me ALL the time ANYTIME.... I know this but I can't seem to grasp how to do this... hmmm... that is one thing that I need to work on... well maybe I shall try and write another time this week. Have a great week if anyone reads this anymore.....

Haven't posted in while...

2008-06-12T12:16:00.002-04:00

I'm not really sure why I even bother blogging anymore since not a lot of people even read my posts.... oh well... I guess I just like to write out my thoughts more than anything...

Have been struggling for a while now and some days are better then others which is normal I guess but a pain in some ways also... I am learning a lot more about myself and it is interesting. God has revealed some connections that I have started to see. Which is kind of cool.. I guess. I don't really know what else to post about... that is really all that is going on for me right now... not doing to well but God will bring me through this time eventually.... God bless you all!!

well..... hmmmmm.......

2008-05-13T11:05:00.003-04:00

I am not that good at blogging..... kind of... I read people's blogs and then I don't usually have a lot of time where I can write... Things have been really busy and stressful at times... mostly my causing the stress.. sorta. I don't/can't remember if I have blogged about my seeing a counselor from The Peacemaker Center. I have been going for almost a year... will be a year in July or August I think. For most of the time that I have been going to Peacemaker center, my mom did not know that I was going. I did not tell her b/c I didn't want her to be worrying about me and all. and I felt that it was easier with her not knowing. She knows know and it is good and she has been supportive. She has even read 1 book that I was reading with my counselor and we are reading another book now and my mom is reading it also and we are going to go over it together. I have been doing good here and there and then I just totally took another nose dive in the wrong direction and now I think I am coming back up... Life has been a little ruff for me. I have made some not so good choices but I am doing better and God still has me and I am doing farely well today and yesterday also... well, i don't really know whatelse to write right now.. I am tired.. somethings never change :) lol.. I think that is about it... will try and blog later this week! love and miss you all!!!!

HAPPY NEW YEAR!!!!!!

2008-02-19T15:09:00.003-05:00

LOL! Well, it has been a very busy couple months for me and then i AGAIN forgot my new password and so i had to change it again. (dumb dumb) So I am back and will try and be better at blogging..... a lot and nothing is new! please continue to pray for me. I am still going through a hard time but it is getting gradually better. I am in counseling and have been for probably 6-7 months or so. it has been hard at times but who said it was going to be easy? i have done so dumb stuff and am trying not to fall again. but of course i will fall but i am hoping i won't make them same stupid mistakes. i have been reading your blogs though... just have not had anytime to update mine unfortunetly... i have another job now working at the church. i work on the facilities which is pretty much cleaning and what not. I had my first night this past Saturday night. I will be working Sunday nights after the Bridge. I got the awesome opportunity to sing at Bridge this past Sunday. It was a lot of fun except people said they couldn't hear me very well..... if i get to do it again I will raise the mic and have them turn me up... oh well... one other really big thing was that i talked to my mom about EVERYTHING that has been going on. She has been really supportive of me and wants to help me. I might be going away to get some treatment possibly...ask me for details... if you care that is... well... i am going to get going now! have a great day!!!!

Hello My Lovely Friends...

2007-08-21T12:10:00.000-04:00

Look who is back.... Sorry for the long extended leave..... number of things were happening plus I could not for the life of my remember what my freakin password was to log on here.. and then things just got to be soooo busy that I didn't feel like trying to figure it out or change my password!! but anyway! i am back!!!

Here is an update for ya... I am currently looking for a FT job that I will be able to get benefits and the such. Please pray that I find one soon so I don't have to kill myself by having 3 jobs.... not that it is that bad since it is all PT and I don't work all 3 in the same day!

And also I am starting think about moving out of my house, but not right away... I know of these girls who are looking for a 3rd roommate and it would only be like $375 a month! Not to bad huh? Well, Let me know what is going on with you all!!! Miss you like crazy!!! Love you all!! Take care! God bless!! Good luck to everyone who is either going back to classes, or going back to teaching for the year!!!

Praise God!!!

2006-12-27T20:56:00.000-05:00

I just wanted to let you all know that I have a new job!!!! Im really excited about it too! I will be working at Calvary Fellowship Church as a receptionist! I start this coming Tuesday!!! thats about it for now!! have a wonderful New Years!!!

long time since i have posted...

2006-12-05T23:54:00.000-05:00

Hey my friends!!! Sorry it has taken me a while to post something.... i've done it again and gotten myself fired!! i don't know why this keeps happening.... this time it was easier though... not really in the mood to talk to much about it now but yeah... please pray that i can find a new job fast because i do have expenses that need to be taken care of... please pray for me in general that i can "smarten up". i don't think before I act and that has to do with a lot of the problem or maybe its more than that... i don't know but it needs to stop and all........ i don't know why this is happening.... I know Kohl's was getting really wearing on me but its not the best way for me to leave... but im gonna go to bed im tired and i have a lot of job searching to do tomorrow so yeah... if any of you knows anyone who is hiring please let me know... thanks and please pray for me!

life is rocky

2006-11-07T23:59:00.000-05:00

Hey all! Life is a little rocky right now. Please pray for me. I am trying to let God get me through this. I am trying to learn how to trust in him with everything! Well... its time for bed for me... i can hardly keep my eyes open!!!

To All My Friends!!!

2006-10-07T20:18:00.001-04:00

""Today is love your friends day. Send this to all your friends and me if I am 1. If you get 7 back, then you are a TRUE FRIEND....

...And...

......THEY SAY iT TAKES A MiNUTE......
.......TO FiND A SPECiAL PERSON, .......
.....AN HOUR TO APPRECiATE THEM, ......
.........A DAY TO LOVE THEM, ........
..........AN ENTiRE LiFE TiME.........
..............TO 4GET THEM.............

.......SEND THiS TO THE PEOPLE......
.............U'LL NEVER 4GET..............
.........ITS A SHORT MESSAGE..........
...........TO LET THEM KNOW.............
......THAT U'LL NEVER 4GET THEM......

...iF U DON'T SEND THiS TO ANYONE...
.......iT MEAN UR'RE iN A HURRY.......
..........AND THAT U 4GOTTEN.........
...............THE PEOPLE..............
.................YOU LOVE............

......@.@.@.@..@..
....@........@..........@
...@............@....@@
...@..............@@..@
....@..............@...@
......@...........@..@
.........@......@..@
..............@..@
.I.................@
....CARE.........@
.........ABOUT....@
................YOU...@........@@@
......@@@@..@....@..........@
...@.............@@@......@@
.......@@@.......@..@@
.........................@
.........................@
.........................@
.........................@
.........................@
........................@
.......................@

send this rose to everyone you care about including me if you care. See how many times you get this, if you get a dozen your loved!

A must read!! Rapist on Myspace/AIM/AOL

2006-10-06T18:49:00.000-04:00

THERE IS A RAPIST ON MYSPACE
Body: Date: Oct 5, 2006 8:18 AM
Subject WARNING: RAPIST ON MYSPACE***PLEASE PASS THIS :
Body: WARNING: RAPIST ON MYSPACE***PLEASE PASS THIS :
WARNING: RAPIST ON MYSPACE***PLEASE PASS THIS :
WARNING: RAPIST ON MYSPACE***PLEASE PASS THIS :
WARNING: RAPIST ON MYSPACE***PLEASE PASS THIS :
WARNING: RAPIST ON MYSPACE***PLEASE PASS THIS :
WARNING: RAPIST ON MYSPACE***PLEASE PASS THIS :
WARNING: RAPIST ON MYSPACE***PLEASE PASS THIS : ****************************************************
THERE IS A RAPIST ON MYSPACE
WARNING READ!! RAPIST ON MYSPACE LOOK OUT

please read.... not a joke....
State police warning for online: Please read this "very carefully"..then send it out to all the people online that you know. Something like this is nothing to be taken casually; this is something you DO want to pay attention to.

If a person with the screen-name of jokerkid613/Ja$on MoNeY contacts you, do not reply. DO NOT talk to this person; do not answer any of his/her instant messages or e-mail. Whoever this person may be, he/she is a suspect for murder in the death of 56 women (so far) contacted through the Internet. Please send this to all the women on your buddy list and ask them to pass this on, as well. This screen-name was seen on Yahoo, AOL, AIM, and Excite so far. This is not a joke! Please send this to men too...just in case! Send to everyone you know! Ladies, this is serious.
Gentlemen, PLEASE let your Lady Friends know....

Jennifer S. Faulkner
Education/Information Specialist Roanoke Fire-EMS
541 Luck Avenue
Suite 120 Roanoke, VA 24016
540) 853-2257 (phone)
540) 853-1172 (fax)

IF WE CAN PASS ON JOKES, SURELY WE CAN PASS ON A WARNING THAT MAY SAVE A FRIENDS LIFE

For all of you!! love you my friends!

2006-09-28T12:08:00.000-04:00

To: YOU
Date: Today
From: God
Subject: YOURSELF
Reference: LIFE
I am God. Today I will be handling all of your problems. Please remember that I do not need your help. If life happens to deliver a situation to you that you cannot handle, do not attempt to resolve it. Kindly put it in the SFGTD (something for God to do) box. All situations will be resolved, but in My time, not yours. Once the matter is placed into the box, do not hold onto it by worrying about it. Instead, focus on all the wonderful things that are present in your life now.
- If you find yourself stuck in traffic; Don't despair. There are people in this world for whom driving is an unheard of privilege.
- Should you have a bad day at work; Think of the man who has been out of work for years.
- Should you despair over a relationship gone bad; Think of the person who has never known what it's like to love and be loved in return.
- Should you grieve the passing of another weekend; Think of the woman in dire straits, working twelve hours a day, seven days a week to feed her children.
- Should your car break down, leaving you miles away from assistance; Think of the paraplegic who would love the opportunity to take that walk.
- Should you notice a new gray hair in the mirror; Think of the cancer patient in chemo who wishes she had hair to examine.
- Should you find yourself at a loss and pondering what is life all about, asking what is my purpose? Be thankful. There are those who didn't live long enough to get the opportunity.
- Should you find yourself the victim of other people's bitterness, ignorance, smallness or insecurities; Remember, things could be worse. You could be one of them!
- Should you decide to send this to a friend; Thank you, you may have touched their life in ways you will never know!

life is looking up...

2006-09-18T22:09:00.000-04:00

Hey friends! I am doing better then I was before.... I had kind of a crappy weekend but it got better.... I think it is manily me that is the problem... I always let things get to me and then it "floods" my mind. And then I can't get it out of my head. And I have found that I don't go to God first.. I usually ask people to pray for me not that thats wrong but I should be looking to God through everything first and foremost! I love going to the Bridge and just being in fellowship with other Christians especially girls!!! I am meeting so many great new people!! I am starting really forgive myself for all that has happened to me... I have totally stopped talking to that guy I was saying who was talking sexually to me. I had had enough of him and it built up to the point where I couldn't completely function with thoughts of hurting myself.... because of all that stuff he said and just with everything that was happening... I feel soooooo much better not talking to him. He really pissed me off and just put me in a bad mood. Especially last Thursday when he called me while in the hospital and talked for like a straight 10 minutes without me talking and all.... and I was with a friend. And I said that and he said well ya could have told me that! And hung up.. I was like thats it!! Turns out he's not having the surgery now b/c he got into a fight with the doctors and actually got kicked out of the hospital!!!!! haha!!! don't know how that happened but yeah! Sorry i am liking switching colors when I write my blogs! I hope you enjor the colors! heeeheee!! God is definitley stretching and growing me!!! Sunday and today have been good days for me!! Today I worked at 10-6:30 and it wasn't too bad... kinda busy and then slow at times... I didn't really have any negative thoughts today which is good b/c I was just happy and not really caring about anything.... I like most of the people I work with including the managers.... I like to joke around and stuff... make it a little fun/interesting... My managers say I am the "Credit Queen"... so far this month I have opened 14 credit apps for customers.... in one day I opened 8!!! Today I opened 3. It makes me feel good when I get them b/c they get really happy and all.... and they are not down our throats.... lol!! I went to have dinner with Ruth at her house with Sophia and another of ruth's friends.... we had tacos and stuff... its was gooooooodddddd!!!! I love taco salads!! She gave me some for lunch tomorrow!!! And now I am really really happy!!!!! So yeaah!!! Hope all is well with everyone!! Love ya all!!!!

2006-09-10T23:08:00.000-04:00

Hey my beautiful friends!!!! God is just awesome and amazing!!! I am just sooo happy happy happy!!!! I obviously can't contain myself right now!!! haha! Although the first part of my weekend wasn't the best it ended great!!! Im alive and well!!!! I have God, I have family, I have friends.... what more could a girl ask for?! Bridge tonight at Kerr Park was auhmazing!!!!!!!!!!!! Really really really really awesome! Just what I needed!!! There was a slight breeze and it was God telling me that He was there and wrapping his arms around me and telling me that everything is and will be ok and to trust in Him!!!!!! There was also a bird flying and just flew higher and higher in the sky! One thing I have been praying about is to see God in the small things and to be open to Him showing me himself! Well how about that?! During church at CFC this morning and at Bridge when I close my eyes during worship I see a girl dancing her heart out for Jesus! I am just sooo excited for what God has for me this next year and the years to come.... I just need to learn to trust Him with EVERYTHING and all parts of my life and not "beat around the bush" and take back my regrets and all..... wow that was a long run on... haha oh well!! im not in English class.. heheh!!! but yeah! God is awesome! I love him with my whole being!!!! God bless you all!!!!!!!!! GO EAGLES!! THEY WON BABY!!!! hahaha sorry!!!

update on my blog from earlier!!!!!

2006-09-10T00:35:00.000-04:00

Just a quick update from my blog earlier today.... I am doing better than I was earlier.... I know I definitley overreact a lot of the time. I just get so over worked about differenet things.. I spent from 5-10 reading my bible at Barnes & Noble..... I actually go there a lot to read and just relax. It is so calming there. I love it! I am at peace right now. I am thankful for everything that I have. Most people don't have anything and I have a roof over my head, a computer which I can have in my room, a comfortable bed, a fan, A/C, a small flat screen tv, a cell phone, a nice car, good friends, clothing on my back... and I could go on and on!! This day has got me thinking more about others instead of myself... yes it started out about me.. but I shouldn't be worrying about anything!! Here is a verse in which I really like especially right now!! Philippians 4:6-7 Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. 7.And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus. How awesome is that?! We don't have to worry about anything!! God is sooo awesome!!! My heart is happy and light!!! I don't know why I was so dramatic... I just got wrapped up in everything!! God bless you all! Love you all!!

not doing too good....

2006-09-09T15:59:00.000-04:00

My life right now is a roller coaster... thats the best way to explain it! I will be fine for a while maybe a two days or so but yeah... Then I just am not myself... I hear someone say something or someone talks to me and then I start degrading myself and really beating myself up over most of the time nothing! Then I will talk with a friend and it helps and then bam again the cycle begins again! Why why why why?!?!?! I don't know and I don't understand! I wish someone would just come and kill me right now and put me out of my misery! Im sorry I am talking like this right now but it is the way I feel right now. I can't stand hearing people fight about anything and then put me in the arguement oh heck no!!!!!! Im sorry I just can't handle anything right now... I feel like I need to run away or something.. I don't have anywhere to go and I don't have the money or anything... i need a break from life... im so tired... i just want everything to stop!! i dont want/can't pretend everything is ok. when it is not!! My world, my everything is crumbling down!! I just needed some place to right down everything.... im sure in a day or two ill be better than i am right now!

why is life so hard and complicated!?

2006-09-08T07:40:00.000-04:00

I am soo tired and being hurt and "abused" if ya wanna say..... I've just had enough of this life right now... don't really know whats going on. I am livin the moment to moment and thinking what the heck am I doing? nothing.. I don't know what to do.... I feel all I can do is write and cry if I need to... I have a hard time talking about my life... I'd rather be helping someone else than dealing with my own life and problems....Maybe that is good but I don't know. I feel that I am not that important... I don't know... I am at a stage of "i don't know's".... well I will write more later... gotta get lunch ready and have breakfast... and go to work :(.....

frustrated!!

2006-08-30T21:49:00.000-04:00

Hey all! Why do guys have to be such a's????? I don't understand what it is with me and perverted guys..... All I want is to please God and not anything else. I don't want a relationship right now. And this guys says he is attracted to me... and keeps saying stuff when he knows darn well I don't like it!!! Guys piss me off! I am getting the impression that I am bad luck when it comes to relationships.... I don't really care about it... It just makes me feel really uncomfortable and disgusted.... like I wanna go hid under a rock and not come out!!

On another note.... everything else is going pretty well. I have been at Kohls for a year now! Nothing really bad has happened except with that Jen girl who was stealing money from us... still haven't gotten my money back yet!!! But yeah... nothing really new is going on besides the darn guy problems.... but anywho..... I just want to focus on God and trust in Him. I have been doing really well with my feelings of myself. On Sunday, I went to get a water from 7 eleven before going to Bridge and as I was walking in I was like I feel pretty and I feel good about myself... I didn't have bad thoughts/wasn't "condeming" myself for the crap that has happened... I didn't even care what people thought of me! I am still feeling like this off and on this week... but with the guy issue it has made it a little hard... So yeah! If you could pray for me that would be good.... I miss you all! Love you!

reflections of the summer

2006-08-17T15:47:00.000-04:00

Things have been going pretty good!! I am understanding how much God loves me and its just so awesome to be reminded of it. I am in a bible study on Wed. nights and it has just been so awesome. It is Beth Moores "Breaking Free" and Had read some of it before in another bible study but didn't read it all. Now I re-read it and am so excited more than I was when I first started reading it! I am understanding it also... which helps! :-D hehe!! This summer has been tuff at times and then it will good and then back to hard times.... lately I am learning how to trust more in God and just give him EVERYTHING! Give him My all!! And through that I am able to trust more people and open up to others... especially in my bible study. I am usually the quiet one and just keep to myself and lately I have been able to just talk about like what the chapters have said to me and just be able to be grown and stretched.... It's awesome! I am more comfortable with talking about stuff that has happened to me in the past and things that have happened to me lately. And ya know I am starting to not care about what people say about me! It doesn't matter!!!! I am a beautiful Child of the Lord!!!! I don't even sound like the regular Jen! I don't know who this is!! hehe! I know who it is but ya know what I mean! lol!!! God is awesome!!! Thats my update for the day/week! Love you all! God bless you!!!

hello!!!!!!

2006-08-17T10:51:00.000-04:00

Hey all!! Things are going really well!!!! God is good!!! I have been growing and being stretched this past summer!! Its awesome! At times hard but I have been learning and so it's good!!! Nothing really new is going on with me..... just working and hanging out with friends and that kinda thing!! So yeah!!! Not too much else!!! Hope to see ya all soon! Love ya!

blah

2006-08-13T03:39:00.000-04:00

Thats the kind of mood I am in right now after being woken up by my stupid computer aftering falling asleep just about an hour ago.. since i couldn't sleep and all.... oh well mind you I tried go to bed at 12:30 and couldn't sleep say came back on till like 1:30 and tried to fall asleep and did and then computer restarts itself to update a program or something... Well now I can't sleep again and now I don't feel well!! argh!!!

Anyway things have been a little rocky this past week... I am doing good now just tired and not really feeling well! But not complaining... Im gonna try and go back to sleep... will update more later! love to all!

searching

2006-07-23T17:32:00.000-04:00

Today has been a pretty good day! Just hanging out as I usually do now on my Sundays since I have off. I go to church usually Calvary Fellowship at 11:30 and then maybe hang out with a friend or not... just have some quiet time and just relax. It feels good to be able to not do too much every Sunday. I was looking/reading the blogs from the missions trip to Kenya with Word FM, and it really is tugging at my heart again that I need to go out and do something. It might just be in the West Chester area but I just feel led to help others mainly kids but anyone! It brought tears to my eyes to read about the children of Africa! I feel that all that has happened to me this past year and half has happened because God made it happen. To break me down and re-grow me and stretch me and change me! Well, I am definitley changing! And now I want to help others change and to be a light to the lost. I want to just do things for others and not expect anything in return not that I ever expect things from my friends. I freely give! That is how God made me!!! Love you all!!!

GOD IS GOOD!!!!!!!

2006-07-22T23:18:00.000-04:00

Hey all!!! Well how about that?! Two posts in one night!! Well I am doing pretty darn patutin good right now!!! I am feeling better about the whole guy thing! I am talking on AIM with a friend and a guy... And I was just saying how this whole thing was a blessing in disguise to get me back on track type of thing! Kind of like a kick in the butt! This whole thing has brought me closer to friends and helping me to be in the word! I am trying to think better... and not "bash" myself or so stupid non-sense!!! Which can be hard but I can do it with the help of my friends!! So if you are with me or see me and I am saying stuff that is degrading be like Jen what are ya saying??? Keep me accountable for that and correct for me!!! I am really starting change and it is amazing and I feel good!! I am happy actually!!! I am realizing I don't need a guy in my life and God may not want me to be married who knows.... that is a long time from now! I am not thinking about that now! I want to live for God and only him!!!!! GOD IS SOOOO GOOOD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! God bless you all! Love you!

So yeah I had dinner with a guy friend of mine and we were waiting to be seated and all... and there was a rainbow! I haven't seen a rainbow in so long!! Well that was kind of a ramble! Have a good night! God loves ya and so do I!!

updates

2006-07-22T22:14:00.000-04:00

Recently that is all I have been posting about.... well... Im sorry for not really blogging all that much. I get busy and tired and at times I just don't feel like typing.... So yeah! Things are getting better, but I am still struggling so if you could continue to pray that would be really awesome! I love you all!! I don't know if I have mention that to you guys lately! I appreciate our friendship!! Things have been busy and stressful! The guy situation is over and I do not talk to that guy anymore. He was not definitley not the right guy for me! He made me do things I didn't really want to do..... it was kinda like "peer pressure" in a way... he kinda talked me into it..... but yeah thats over and as I had said I felt stupid and cheated! I didn't feel like I deserved to be anything or do anything. I am starting not think like that anymore.... I just felt really bad and I felt like hiding in a way.... like I was robbed of all my joy and love... like when you are raped. Kind of like that. I am doing better but I am not completely healed of the feelings. I have learned a lot and am trying to just talk about it and not keep everything bottled up inside... What is that going to do?? it will make things worse not better..... Well, I will blog soon again! Love you all!! Thanks for being my friends! And thanks for helping me along the way in the different ways that you help!

updates................

2006-07-15T18:22:00.000-04:00

Hey friends! Sorry I haven't really talkative on here and on phone if you have called me or I call you. As you know if you read my latests blogs, I have been going through some crap. Things are getting better. Some of you read the blog where I said I guy like me from aol im... well thats over and I really don't care anymore about him.He just like made me do things I wouldn't normally do and he hurt me like emotionally. I do not need that. I deserve better. All i can say is this has been good b/c I have be praying and reading the bible more. I have gotten closer to God through this. Please be praying for me! Love you all! It has definitley been a learning experience for me.....

need prayers!!!

2006-07-13T11:41:00.000-04:00

I don't want to go into but I just need prayers for strength and courage and for healing....... I think I went to far and did something stupid...... thats all im gonna say!

sorry......

2006-07-11T15:07:00.000-04:00

After re-reading my post from last night.. i feel like I need to apologize! I was just really tired and upset and all. I am doing better. i have been able to talk with some of my friends and all which have been nice. About the comment I said about my friend talk to me about guys and stuff... well it doesn't really bother me in a way b/c I don't know. yeah I have never been in a relationship with any guys that doesn't mean I don't know anything ya know? So yeah that was kinda stupid of me. Just so you guys all know................................................ are ya ready for this?! there's a guy that i have been talking to online for a couple of days now and he likes me... so who knows! I'll be posting updates more on this later! Right now I gotta get ready for work! Love you all!!

ahhhhhhh!!!!!!!!

2006-07-10T22:55:00.000-04:00

That is my mood right now! I am so frazzeled and going into pieces at the moment! Things are getting to me.... like friends problems and whatnot.... emotional stuff and feelings. I am going through a lot at the moment. And I kinda don't know how to talk about it and don't know if I want to... I have talked to some people. But I am really stressed not by work though.... and I feel depressed... like I want to talk to certain people and then I kind of feel "blown" off in a way. I know thats not really what it is... thats how it feels to me though. Like last night after the Bridge and all I just felt alone and stuff. I usually stay and talk with people till around 10:30 but not last night. I left at like 10 and want to Appetites with a girl I went to high school with and we ended up sitting with these three guys.... Sometimes I just feel like I need to be alone and all. That was last night, but I couldn't be alone.... I couldn't sleep last night. I had a pain in my stomach and couldn't get comfortable and just had twenty millions things running through my head at once. Then my friend from Bridge was like I wanted to call ya last night but thought it was too late and all.... and ya know I don't care if she did or didn't but I mean she just wanted to talk about guy stuff/problems and what not... well ya know what? I don't give a crap and I really am the wrong person to talk to about that..... but I like that she trusts me about that. And I don't know maybe I am the only one who will really listen to her rant about it... so whatever... i'll keep my mouth shut. Please be praying for me. I want to be healed from my pain and all that is carrying me down!

updates on life

2006-07-05T20:47:00.000-04:00

Hey friends! Things have been really busy and that is why I haven't updated recently. Sorry about that! Or when I had the time to I was dead tired! Thank you for praying for me. I feel God is healing me gradually! If you want to know more just send me an email or something. Please continue to pray please. I am doing well. Just been really busy. I have been working a lot but shorter hours since they have been cutting the hours :( I need the hours... I am meeting a lot of great people at the Bridge and at CrossRoads. I am hanging out with more Christians which is also helping me to be stretched and get out of my comfort zone. So God is growing me and God is good!!!! That is all for now! Will update more later! Love you all!

much needed prayers

2006-05-29T21:55:00.000-04:00

Hey my lovely beautiful friends! Things have really been busy and stressful at times. I am getting tired of some of the things going on.... but ya thats another issue..... I really need you guys to be praying for me... i feel very "weak" not physically but spiritually... like kind of a Sunday christian. I am not saying that I don't do stuff with the church through the week its just I don't feel really connected and then with work it gets me down and I get really upset and angry like I was at Boscov's. And I feel at times depressed. These are some of the emotions I have had bottled up and its not healthy and I know this but it is sooo hard to talk to people about this. That is why I have been not writing too much lately. I hate my life at the moment. I get yelled at by my step dad about the stupidest stuff about like the future and my health. I know I need to do something about it all but I don't know what to do or how to do it....Im really tired of the BS I get from my step dad at different times. I know it is his way of caring about me but it doesn't really work... Tomorrow I have to go to court for the girl who stole from our lockers at work. And I kind of nervous because of what happened to me and if it is mentioned. Please pray!I am really tired of being treated like a child in some ways. Like for instance my mom asked me tonight if she should come with me to the court thing.... I was like no that would be stupid and all. I need to start doing somethings on my own to help me be more independent. Well... for now thats all! I love ya! Take care!

Jen's ramblings!

2006-05-03T00:06:00.000-04:00

Hey there my friends!!! I am back.... not really gone away but I am blogging again!! yayayay! hehe! Sorry for how long it took me to blog again. Things were busy and I just plain a simple was not in the mood to blog. I am doing better than the last time I blogged but I am still not 100% me. Things are just getting to me and thats all I will say for now. I have had really busy weeks with work and weekends my gosh!!! I babysat this past Saturday night. I was only suppose to babysit till 12ish well the parents didn't come home till 1:15(the dad anyway). And then I woke up Sunday at 8:15 and went to church and sang with my churches youth choir. I am friends and I work with the director so she would be angry if I didn't come and plus her youngest son had his 1st Communion. So I kind of had to go. I have babysat for her so I kind of felt that I needed/should go... It was cool though! And we sang pretty well. And our harmonys were pretty good too. Then this week I am working 6 days straight!!! I think they are trying to kill me. But its not that bad b/c the hours are spaced out.... which is good..... Can you guys do me a favor(John Reilly Band too)! Please vote for them so they can play at Creation this summer! Here's the link! http://www.hearitfirst.com/genres/indiescovery.aspx Thanks guys! Love ya all!!!

lalalala

2006-04-21T21:06:00.000-04:00

Hey all!! Sorry I haven't blogged in a little while. Things have been on my mind and on my heart. I have been struggling and I need some prayer. So if you could pray for me that would be great! Please just ask me what is up and all. I don't feel like typing a lot on here. I love you all!!! Sorry Becca for not updating for a while.... Talk to ya all later!

A really great poem!

2006-04-21T21:03:00.000-04:00

When I say... "I am a Christian" I'm not shouting "I'm clean livin."I'm whispering "I was lost,"Now I'm found and forgiven.

When I say..."I am a Christian"I don't speak of this with pride.I'm confessing that I stumble and need CHRIST to be my guide.

When I say... "I am a Christian"I'm not trying to be strong.I'm professing that I'm weak and need HIS strength to carry on.

When I say... "I am a Christian"I'm not bragging of success.I'm admitting I have failed and need God to clean my mess.

When I say... "I am a Christian"I'm not claiming to be perfect,My flaws are far too visible but, God believes I am worth it.

When I say... "I am a Christian"I still feel the sting of pain,I have my share of heartaches So I call upon His name.

When I say... "I am a Christian"I'm not holier than thou,I'm just a simple sinner who received God's good grace, somehow.~Maya Angelou~

Wonderful weekend!!!!

2006-04-10T23:09:00.000-04:00

Despite my last blog, I did have a really good weekend!!! I worked Friday night till 9:30 and then came I did something but I can't remember what I did.... I think I grabbed a quick bite to eat and then on Saturday I had helped at the Lionville YMCA with the Healthy Kids Day. That was fun! I went with some people from Kohls. One guy handed out game prizes and I started out doing the snacks(pretzles, apples, juice and grapes) and then I was helping with the crafts. We made picture frames. It was really fun! And then at 2 I had lunch with a friend I work with and then I had to work 6:45 till 11:30. That kind of sucked but it wasn't too bad. It was pretty quite as it got later obviously. Then on Sunday, Palm Sunday, I went to my church (Sts. Peter and Paul) and sang with the youth choir. I am friends with the director and shed kill me if I didnt stay in the choir. She does not care how old I am. And then I had do something with a couple of friends and then Laura and I went Valley Forge park and walked around for a little and I got to see Laura's house. Which is very cute! And then I went to the Bridge and it was AMAZING!!!! I went out to eat with Sophie. Even though it rained on Saturday it was still a pretty weekend, especially yesterday!!! There was not even a cloud in the sky! Well I love ya all!!! It is two(2) blogs for me in one day! How about them apples!?

ramblings

2006-04-10T23:03:00.000-04:00

Hey my friends! I am so frustrated with work right now that a couple times today while I was at work I felt like I was going to walk out. I felt like I could just cry because I was/am pissed and really fed up with the crap!! They don't know how to do schedules. This week is going to be horrible to start with because there is no school!!!! What does that mean?! Taking your kids shopping!!!!!!! AHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!! Well it sucks! I love kids to death but some of these kids are really bad and horrible. Like this one girl who hit her mom right in front of me and a little girl. I was like are you freakin kidding me!!! That was last week though but still!!! It makes you wonder....... Just please keep me in your prayers. I really need to think and pray what it is that God wants me to do in life. And I need to find a new job that hopefully pays better!

This is for Becca!

2006-04-05T22:09:00.000-04:00

I kept my word and I am updating my blog!!! I have been busy with work. The past three days I have been working 12-8(mon) 12-7:30(tue) and 12-6 (wed) And it has basically all been on register which gets tiring b/c I have to just stand there and I can't just go to the bathroom when I need to or take my break when I want. It stinks.. but what can I do? I have to do what my schedule says. And my foot has been hurting b/c I don't have a toe nail on my left pinky toe. It is growing back now but it hurts when it is rubbed by my sock and all. I am listening to the news and the weather just came on and it said we might have more odd weather! yuck!!! It seems like everyone is dying around the same time. I just found out a family friend just died from lung cancer. We weren't sure how long she would live. We knew she wasn't doing well. She was a heavy smoker and then she quit and then got lung cancer and it had already spread through her body. It has been a hard two months. Just the other night(i think it was Monday) I had a dream that my uncle said mass again at our church or a church. So it was weird b/c I know he's dead but it felt so real. And I think it is because I never got to go to the hospital before he died. So it is harder on me. Most of my family got to see him. My mom told me that he had asked about me and how I was doing. So that was cool. I am so sad and mad at myself that I didn't go see him. But we didn't know he was going to die. Why did this have to happen??? to such a faithul and God fearing man. Give me a call if you want to do something this weekend I have the house to myself starting Saturday sometime till Thursday. Have great rest of the week! Love ya all!!

ramblings

2006-03-19T14:56:00.000-05:00

Hey all! Sorry I haven't blogged in a while. Been busy and needed sometime just to realx and be with family after the death of my uncle. It has been hard but its always hard when someone you love dies! Things are going ok... Life is life ya know? Kohls is going ok. I haven't been scheduled that much recently. They are giving the hours to the new people that they hire who by the way QUIT after like a week or some the day after they start!!!!! So all the people who have worked their for years or about a year or so have like a lot less hours then what they had had. It sucks but what are ya going to do!? It has been a little hard because people have asked if they could stay longer than their shift and the managers say no. even though most of the time their is hours but they just don't say anything. Like in kids for instance, the supervisor is the only one in the dept. most of the time and they say oh we don't have any hours in there... ya right!!!! And there is a bunch of gaps when people come in. Like on Friday I came in at 4(which I was not scheduled) and my supervisor was leaving at 2. I was actually taking her place b/c she was suppose to work 2-10:30 because she got invited to something and she asked me if I was able to work. well thats all I have for today! I hope you all have a fantastic week! Hope to see some of ya soon!

Please be thinking about my family!

2006-03-08T22:33:00.000-05:00

My lovely friends, as I have posted earlier my uncle passed away this on Monday. He was a priest and he was loved by some many people. I ask you to pray for my family and friends tomorrow. We are having the burial and mass. We had a prayer service and it was hard! A lot of priests and people he preached too were there. It was hard. And tomorrow it will be even harder. Please be thinking about my family! Thanks! Right now I have to go to bed b/c I can barely see b/c of crying so much... my eyes are stinging like mad!!!!

Sad day with sad news!!!!

2006-03-06T21:04:00.000-05:00

Thanks for praying for my uncle. He couldn't fight the infection that he had in his liver, which unfortunetly killed him. He passed away at around 4:30 or so. This will be a hard week for us. Please keep our family in your prayers. It would be muchly appreciated! Thanks! I love ya all!!!

Prayer request/update on my uncle!

2006-02-27T22:01:00.000-05:00

Hey folks! My uncle(who is a priest), Fr. Bill, has been in the hospital this past week and a half or so. He has major liver damage and is going to be getting a liver transplant. Fr. Bill was put on the transplant list at around 11 am this morning. He gets a call saying that there is a liver that he might be able to have. He has a rare blood type so he could get a liver at any time! While my step-dad was at the hospital tonight, he got a call saying that a liver was available and he might be getting it depends if the person before him is a match with the liver. We will find out at around mid-night tonight. Please keep my family in your prayers! Especially Fr. Bill and the doctors and nurses and my parents and his brother Kevin, Chuck(who lives in Arizona) and his sister who will be coming from NJ and stay with us if he does have the surgery! I will post updates as I get them! Love ya! Thanks!

updates on everything.....

2006-02-24T23:39:00.000-05:00

Theres not a a whole lot new with me right now!!! Which can be good in a way.... I have been busy working and trying to make time to hang out with friends which at times can be hard. I am really trying to think of what is new.... I can't really think right now b/c I am tired and am starting to get a little headache. Speaking about headaches. I think I might still have lymes disease. I don't know for sure though. My muscles and joints have been achey. Thats all that I really can think of that is new.... until next time! I love you all my friends! Thanks for being my friend!

Prayer needed

2006-02-24T23:34:00.000-05:00

Hey all!! As the title says my family needs prayer..... My uncle has not been feeling well for the last week or two. And this week he was admitted to the hospital. We are unsure of what actually has been going on, but we know he has some liver damage and will more than likely need a liver transplant. He has had a series of tests for the past few days he's been in the hospital. The good news about the liver transplant is that he has a semi-rare blood type, therefore, he will probably get a liver faster than most. It has been a little bit stressful on my family. Especially I think my step-dad b/c it is his brother. I will give updates as I get them! Thanks!

HAPPY BIRTHDAY BECCA!!!!!

2006-02-14T16:26:00.000-05:00

Happy Birthday Becca! Hope your day is awesome!!!! Also Happy Valentines Day Everyone!! Love ya all!!! Take care! It's just another day.... lol!

More updates....

2006-02-11T20:44:00.000-05:00

Hey my lovely friends! I have been kinda busy and have not had a lot of time to post... I have been checking to see what is going on with all of you! I miss all of you!!!! I can't wait for summer so we can hang out more(hopefully).... I wish it had not snowed but hey I can't control the weather!!!! It makes me sad because I can't do everything that I want to do and need to do... but oh well.... it can wait.. My youth choir at my church(Sts. Peter and Paul) was suppose to sing tomorrow at 9 am and now b/c of the snow we are not singing.... so yeah... oh well.... shhtuff happens!! And then ya move on.. right? Work is going okk.... just been busy and a little pissed off.... The managers don't understand anything and it gets me upset.... I have to like split myself into like 10 different people(which by the way is impossible) to get all the things the ask me to do. I have to be putting stuff back which is like piled up to the wallazoo!!! I have to go on register for however long I need to be there and then a manager will ask "oh jen how's the recovery(close back on floor)?" I am finding out this job is a lose lose situation. I have to do so many things and nothing gets done especially when they tell me to go to another dept. and then bizitch at me for kids looking like crap! I am getting tired of it, but at the same time I like where I am and what I am doing for the most part...... Please just pray that managers won't be down my throat so much! I have cried once at work because I feel like it is not worth even doing anything b/c people will just mess it up right after you get done fixing it!!! And another time a manager yelled at me for not having gotten done alll the recovery! LIKE I AM SUPERWOMAN!!! I don't think so.... if you want it to get done YOU CAN'T KEEP ASKING PEOPLE TO GO SOMEWHERE ELSE AND EXPECT THE RECOVER TO GET DONE?!?! hELLO!! Ok sorry about that... Im frustrated with them.... well, I hope everyone is doing well!!! ttyl! Love ya!!!!!!

Love Letter read at Bridge

2006-02-11T20:42:00.000-05:00

You may not know me, but I know everything about you. Psalm 139:1
I know when you sit down and when you rise up. Psalm 139:2
I am familiar with all your ways. Psalm 139:3
Even the very hairs on your head are numbered. Matthew 10:29-31
For you were made in my image. Genesis 1:27
In me you live and move and have your being. Acts 17:28
For you are my offspring. Acts 17:28
I knew you even before you were conceived. Jeremiah 1:4-5
I chose you when I planned creation. Ephesians 1:11-12
You were not a mistake, for all your days are written in my book. Psalm 139:15-16
I determined the exact time of your birth and where you would live. Acts 17:26
You are fearfully and wonderfully made. Psalm 139:14
I knit you together in your mother's womb. Psalm 139:13
And brought you forth on the day you were born. Psalm 71:6
I have been misrepresented by those who don't know me. John 8:41-44
I am not distant and angry, but am the complete expression of love. 1 John 4:16
And it is my desire to lavish my love on you. 1 John 3:1
Simply because you are my child and I am your Father. 1 John 3:1
I offer you more than your earthly father ever could. Matthew 7:11
For I am the perfect father. Matthew 5:48
Every good gift that you receive comes from my hand. James 1:17
For I am your provider and I meet all your needs. Matthew 6:31-33
My plan for your future has always been filled with hope. Jeremiah 29:11
Because I love you with an everlasting love. Jeremiah 31:3
My thoughts toward you are countless as the sand on the seashore. Psalms 139:17-18
And I rejoice over you with singing. Zephaniah 3:17
I will never stop doing good to you. Jeremiah 32:40
For you are my treasured possession. Exodus 19:5
I desire to establish you with all my heart and all my soul. Jeremiah 32:41
And I want to show you great and marvelous things. Jeremiah 33:3
If you seek me with all your heart, you will find me. Deuteronomy 4:29
Delight in me and I will give you the desires of your heart. Psalm 37:4
For it is I who gave you those desires. Philippians 2:13
I am able to do more for you than you could possibly imagine. Ephesians 3:20
For I am your greatest encourager. 2 Thessalonians 2:16-17
I am also the Father who comforts you in all your troubles. 2 Corinthians 1:3-4
When you are brokenhearted, I am close to you. Psalm 34:18
As a shepherd carries a lamb, I have carried you close to my heart. Isaiah 40:11
One day I will wipe away every tear from your eyes. Revelation 21:3-4
And I'll take away all the pain you have suffered on this earth. Revelation 21:3-4
I am your Father, and I love you even as I love my son, Jesus. John 17:23
For in Jesus, my love for you is revealed. John 17:26
He is the exact representation of my being. Hebrews 1:3
He came to demonstrate that I am for you, not against you. Romans 8:31
And to tell you that I am not counting your sins. 2 Corinthians 5:18-19
Jesus died so that you and I could be reconciled. 2 Corinthians 5:18-19
His death was the ultimate expression of my love for you. 1 John 4:10
I gave up everything I loved that I might gain your love. Romans 8:31-32
If you receive the gift of my son Jesus, you receive me. 1 John 2:23
And nothing will ever separate you from my love again. Romans 8:38-39
Come home and I'll throw the biggest party heaven has ever seen. Luke 15:7
I have always been Father, and will always be Father. Ephesians 3:14-15
My question is…Will you be my child? John 1:12-13
I am waiting for you. Luke 15:11-32Love, Your Dad.

updates.....

2006-01-24T23:44:00.000-05:00

Well, I guess I have blogged a lot today/tonight!!! hahaha! Well, I wanted to let ya all know what was going on around Exton/WC area!! I need some prayers or something. A "friend" from where I used to work at Boscovs, texted message me last night(Monday night) and asked me if I was gay.. I was like um.. k.. right!!! Right, she acclaims I act like I am gay. And then she said to leave her alone and she blocked me... I was so pissed last night. And I don't understand why she'd say something like that..... what are your thoughts?! I will talk to ya later!

Ladies be careful!!!!

2006-01-24T23:27:00.000-05:00

I just saw on the Channel 10 News about 10-20 mins ago that a guy is stealing women's purses. So keep your purse under your arm and be on the look out!!! He was caught on camera at the Exton ACME. I will let you all know more information when I get more. I emailed NBC who broadcasted the news cast. The guys description is he wears a hat and a hooded sweatshirt(on the camera it looked like a black hat and a grey hoody). Prolly around 5'8 or so. It said to call West Goshen Police.

Please read!!!!!!

2006-01-24T23:26:00.000-05:00

Tuesday, January 24, 2006
We'll be taking Blogger down on Wednesday the 25th at 4pm PST to fix a bit of a switch that's gone wonky on us. The outage should last about 15 minutes. Blogger.com and Blog*Spot blogs will be inaccessible during this time.This repair will fix the problem that caused the brief outage last Friday night. We're also using this down time as an opportunity to tune our databases for more efficient spam catching and deletion.

busy

2006-01-18T18:44:00.000-05:00

Hey all! I have been a little busy. Sorry for not blogging much.. So yeah... things have been a little stressful at work. I think I have told some of you that this girl has been stealing from coworkers. Going into their lockers and taking money. Well, this happened to me twice! I was really pissed! Still am but what can I really do about it? I had told a manager both times. And the 2nd time it happened it was more money so one of the managers paged me and told me to come to the office and write a statement and so I did. This was on a Tuesday I think and then that Friday she tried to steal again from a co-worker. But someone came in and saw her and we now have a camera in the break room where all this was happening! So she got caught and got arrested and taken out of the store handcuffed. We eventually will get our money back. She has to pay us back(its her restitution) and if she doesn't then we individually have to take her to court. Also it has been stressful b/c of the managers keep getting down our throats about everything and they ask us to do things and then an hour later the page you and are like so hows your recovery(returns and crap) and they say oh what have you been doing the whole time?! So it's kind of a lose lose type of situation! Well, hope all of you are doing well!!

Happy New Years!!!!

2006-01-03T19:16:00.000-05:00

Happy New Years to all of you!! Things have been really busy with work and doing family stuff!! I have been checking the blogs and all and now I am finally able to take a minute to write some stuff!! Well, Christmas did not feel like Christmas to me but it was and its gone till next year. I got to see a lot of family and friends.

We had our traditional Christmas dinners. On Christmas day we have Chinese Food and then we use to have Johns' Pizza for Christmas Eve dinner but now it is the day after Christmas because of all the kids in the family now who are in plays and what not. I sang at my church on Christmas Eve with the youth choir and we sounded pretty good! It was packed!!!! I have been in that choir for 8 years now! I am one of the "founding" members! The choir director is one of my family friends and I also work with her now at Kohls.

Kohls is starting to slow down but not for returns!!!! Returns are the craziest part at the moment! Things are going pretty well!! Sometimes I get sooo annoyed working there because of the managers. They don't know what they are doing and they screw everything up. And ya get yelled at for not doing something when they told you to do something else.... whatever!!

I got to see my grandmom and aunt on Christmas day and then I will get to see them again sometime soon because we have a family tradition of giving Barnes and Nobles(or for a while it was Borders in DE) gift cards and then we pick a day to go to DE and spend a while there and all. It is always fun and it is always great to see them! I also got to see my grandfather last Thursday. That is him up there!! He said he had to get me a drink for my birthday! so yeah! lol!

I miss hanging out with all of you and I hope to spend sometime with all of you! Love ya and can't wait to see ya! Have a happy New Year!

Random thought

2005-12-22T22:26:00.000-05:00

I haven't written in a while before the last to entries and I forgot to say Happy Anniversary to me for blogging for a year Nov. 24!! So yeah I was just looking through my blogs and all and I was like oops look at that I have had this for a year. Well hope all is well! Love ya all!!!

Tis So Beautiful

2005-12-22T22:11:00.000-05:00

I tried to type this before but some how it got deleted and so I was kind of fed up with the computer and I was like whatever I'll just type later!! I hope everyone is doing well and is ready for Christmas!! Here is my latest and greatest news!!!! This is just copied from my blog on myspace!

Hey my lovely and wonderful friends!!!!! I have had a pretty good week and it is almost over.... I am happy and very excited to say that my family has a new baby boy. My step-brother and his wife just gave birth to a little baby boy named Chase. Her due date was actually in early January. But he was healthy enough to be born early if it so happened which it did!!! My sister-in-law Janelle had to have a C-section because he was breeched(again).... He was upside down before and Mark(my step-bro) was talking to his butt! It was funny. So Janelle is in some pain! Please pray for her that she will be feeling better everyday!! She and Chase is expected to come home on Christmas eve. Babies really are little miracles!!! I am just so happy for them! All of my siblings except my step-brother kevin is married and has at least one child. Well, MERRY CHRISTMAS AND HAVE A VERY HAPPY NEW YEAR!!!!! I love you all!!!!!

This picture is my nephew Chase!!! Isn't he a cutie????

Tis the Season

2005-12-19T17:44:00.000-05:00

Things have been crazy busy because of work... and all the Christmas holiday stuff!!! My computer got a virus and it messed everything up so therefore, I was unable to be online a lot... I know some of you were wondering where I was and all. Well, now ya know! I am back and all is pretty good!!! Busy but good!! Merry Christmas to all of you!!!! I hope everyone is doing well!! Can't wait to catch up with some of you over the holiday! Love ya!

Making Pancakes

2005-11-20T23:23:00.000-05:00

Making Pancakes
I got this from my friend Jessica, and decided to repost it because it's so good!Making PancakesSix -year-old Brandon decided one Saturday morning to fix his parentspancakes He found a big bowl and spoon, pulled a chair to the counter,opened the cupboard and pulled out the heavy flour canister, spilling iton the floor.He scooped some of the flour into the bowl with his hands, mixed inmost of a cup of milk and added some sugar, leaving a floury trail onthe floor which by now had a few tracks left by his kitten.Brandon was covered with flour and getting frustrated He wanted this tobe something very good for Mom and Dad, but it was getting very bad. Hedidn't know what to do next, whether to put it all into the oven or onthe stove and he didn't know how the stove worked!. Suddenly he saw hiskitten licking from the bowl of mix and reached to push her away,knocking the egg carton to the floor. Frantically he tried to clean upthis monumental mess but slipped on the eggs, getting his pajamas whiteand sticky.And just then he saw Dad standing at the door. Big crocodile tearswelled up in Brandon's eyes. All he'd wanted to do was something good,but he'd made a terrible mess. He was sure a scolding was coming, maybeeven a spanking. But his father just watched him.Then, walking through the mess, he picked up his crying son, hugged himand loved him, getting his own pajamas white and sticky in the process!That's how God deals with us. We try to do something good in life, butit turns into a mess. Our marriage gets all sticky or we insult afriend, or we can't stand our job, or our health goes sour.Sometimes we just stand there in tears because we can't think ofanything else to do. That's when God picks us up and loves us andforgives us, even though some of our mess gets all over Him.But just because we might mess up, we can't stop trying to "make pancakes" for God or for others. Sooner or later we'll get it right, andthen they'll be glad we tried...I was thinking. .. and I wondered if I had any wounds needing to behealed, friendships that need rekindling or three words needing to besaid. Sometimes, "I love you" can heal & bless! Remind every one of your friends that you love them. Even if you think they don't love back, you would be amazed at what those three little words, a smile, and a reminder like this can do.Just in case I haven't told you lately... I LOVE YOU!!!Please pass some of this love on to others....suppose one day youwere called to God; do all your friends know you love them?Send this to those you love. And never stop "making pancakes.""May you be blessed by the LORD, who made heaven and earth." Psalm 115:15

it's raining it's pouring, the old man is snoaring! heeh

2005-10-08T13:41:00.000-04:00

Yes, that would be my mood.. haha! I am in a good mood! Its raining cats and dogs but I don't have to work today so it's all good!! I also have Sunday off... and then next week I work Monday-Thursday and have Friday and Sat. off!! yippy!! I am going on the womens retreat with CrossRoads next Friday!! I can't wait! It will be sooo much fun!!! This week went by soooo fast!!! I can't believe it! So yeah this week was pretty good. I have a new computer b/c my old one was about to die and so I was using our downstairs computer. I have a Dell computer! Its practically the same computer as downstairs which is very nice so I don't have to be like um... and how do I use this and all. Well, I will write more later!! I am hanging out with Rachel from CrossRoads at 3 and I have to get ready and all!! So ttyal!!!! love ya!!!

update galore!

2005-09-21T12:42:00.000-04:00

Wow, I feel so bad not updating in such a long time!!!! I hope everyone is doing well!!!! I miss all of you!!! Things are going ok for me.. I got a BRAND NEW car!!!!!!!!! Thanks to my step-dad. It is a Honda Civic. The color is matellic greyish color... its pretty!! I love it!!! I really like working at Kohls.... I got hired at The Halloween Store but I am not going to work there for two reasons.... one being my step-brother knows the people who own the place and he found out that if you are under(doesn't matter how much) or over closing the drawer you get arrested..... I don't/can't have that happening to me... If anyone would like to know why just email me... Don't feel like getting into it.... And the other reason is also because my step-brother said he knows a lot of people that go into the hospital b/c of burn out once the store closes.... I need to be working but if I can endanger myself then I am not going to work there!!!! I don't really have that much else to say I hope you all are well! Love ya alls!!!

The Yellow T-shirt

2005-09-15T17:52:00.000-04:00

The Yellow shirt The baggy yellow shirt had long sleeves, four extra-large pockets trimmed in black thread and snaps up the front. It was faded from years of wear, but still in decent shape. I found it in 1963 when I was home from college on Christmas break, rummaging through bags of clothes Mom intended to give away. "You're not taking that old thing, are you?" Mom said when she saw me packing the yellow shirt. "I wore that when I was pregnant with your brother in 1954!" "It's just the thing to wear over my clothes during art class, Mom. Thanks!" I slipped it into my suitcase before she could object. The yellow shirt be came a part of my college wardrobe. I loved it. After graduation, I wore the shirt the day I moved into my new apartment and on Saturday mornings when I cleaned. The next year, I married. When I became pregnant, I wore the yellow shirt during big-belly days. I missed Mom and the rest of my family, since we were in Colorado and they were in Illinois. But that shirt helped. I smiled, remembering that Mother had worn it when she was pregnant, 15 years earlier. That Christmas, mindful of the warm feelings the shirt had given me, I patched one elbow, wrapped it in holiday paper and sent it to Mom. When Mom wrote to thank me for her "real" gifts, she said the yellow shirt was lovely. She never mentioned it again. The next year, my husband, daughter and I stopped at Mom and Dad's to pick up some furniture. Days later, when we uncrated the kitchen table, I noticed something yellow taped to its bottom. The shirt! And so the pattern was set. On our next visit home, I secretly placed the shirt under Mom and Dad's mattress. I don't know how long it took for her to find it, but almost two years passed before I discovered it under the base of our living-room floor lamp. The yellow shirt was just what I needed now while refinishing furniture. The walnut stains added character. In 1975 my husband and I divorced. With my three children, I prepared to move back to Illinois. As I packed, a deep depression overtook me. I wondered if I could make it on my own. I wondered if I would find a job. I paged through the Bible, looking for comfort. In Ephesians, I read, "So use every piece of God's armor to resist the enemy whenever he attacks, and when it is all over, you will be standing up." I tried to picture myself wearing God's armor, but all I saw was the stained yellow shirt. Slowly, it dawned on me. Wasn't my mother's love a piece of God's armor? My courage was renewed. Unpacking in our new home, I knew I had to get the shirt back to Mother. The next time I visited her, I tucked it in her bottom dresser drawer. Meanwhile, I found a good job at a radio station. A year later I discovered the yellow shirt hidden in a rag bag in my cleaning closet. Something new had been added. Embroidered in bright green across the breast pocket were the words "I BELONG TO PAT." Not to be outdone, I got out my own embroidery materials and added an apostrophe and seven more letters. Now the shirt proudly proclaimed, "I BELONG TO PAT'S MOTHER." But I didn't stop there. I zig-zagged all the frayed seams, then had a friend mail the shirt in a fancy box to Mom from Arlington, VA. We enclosed an official looking letter from "The Institute for the Destitute," announcing that she was the recipient of an award for good deeds. I would have given anything to see Mom's face whe! n she opened the box. But, of course, she never mentioned it. Two years later, in 1978, I remarried. The day of our wedding, Harold and I put our car in a friend's garage to avoid practical jokers. After the wedding, while my husband drove us to our honeymoon suite, I reached for a pillow in the car to rest my head. It felt lumpy. I unzipped the case and found, wrapped in wedding paper, the yellow shirt. Inside a pocket was a note: "Read John 14:27-29. I love you both, Mother." That night I paged through the Bible in a hotel room and found the verses: "I am leaving you with a gift: peace of mind and heart. And the peace I give isn't fragile like the peace the world gives. So don't be troubled or afraid. Remember what I told you: I am going away, but I will come back to you again. If you really love me, you will be very happy for me, for now I can go to the Father, who is greater than I am. I have told you these things before they happen so that when they do, you will believe in me." The shirt was Mother's final gift. She had known for three months that she had terminal Lou Gehrig's disease. Mother died the following year at age 57. I was tempted to send the yellow shirt with her to her grave. But I'm glad I didn't, because it is a vivid reminder of the love-filled game she and I played for 16 years. Besides, my older daughter is in college now, majoring in art. And every art student needs a baggy yellow shirt with big pockets. You have 6 minutes.... There's some mighty fine advice in these words, even if you're not superstitious. This Lotus Totus has been sent To you for good luck from the Anthony Robbins organization. It has been sent around the world ten times so Far. You will receive good luck within four days of relaying this Lotus Totus. Do not keep this message. The Lotus Totus must leave your hands in 6 MINUTES. Otherwise you will get a very unpleasant surprise. This is true, even if you are not superstitious, agnostic, or otherwise faith impaired. Now, here's the FUN part! 1-4 people: Your life will improve slightly. 5-9 people: Your life will improve to your liking. 9-14 people: You will have at least 5 surprises in the next 3 weeks 15 and above: Your life will improve drastically and everything you ever dreamed of will begin to take shape. A true friend is someone who reaches for your hand and touches your heart.

REALLY SAD!!!

2005-08-25T17:48:00.000-04:00

This young lady was recently on Oprah and what a loving, forgiving young woman she is. An amazing story of what she has suffered and will bear the rest of her life. Please share this with your friends and especially your teenagers who are driving.

This is Jacqueline Saburido on September 19, 1999.

This is her and her Father, 1998.

This is her on Vacation in Venezuela.

Birthday party as a child.

At a party with friends.

This is Jacqueline's car. She was hit by another car that was driven by a 17-year old on his way home after drinking with his friends. This was in December 1999.

After the accident Jacqueline has needed over 40 operations.

Jacqueline was caught in the burning car and her body was heavily burnt during around 45 seconds.

With her Father, 2000.

Getting treatment.

Three months after the accident.

Without a left eyelid, Jacquie needs eye drops to keep her vision.

Now 20 years-old, he cannot forgive himself for driving drunk on that night three years ago.
He's aware of devastating Jacqueline Saburido's life.

Not everyone who gets hit with a car dies. This picture was taken 4 years after the accident and the doctors are still working on Jacqueline, whose body was covered 60% with severe burnings.
..
Please send this to as many people as you can to make them aware of the consequences of drinking and driving.
PLEASE PASS THIS ON TO EVERYONE YOU KNOW!

*To post this, click "REPLY TO POSTER," then highlight

GAS PRICES SUCK!!!!

2005-08-23T19:43:00.000-04:00

TRY TO SERIOUSLY FOLLOW UP ON THIS...AND REPOST IT.Dont Buy gas on September 3rd!!!! Boycotting the gas company will decrease the price dramatically. Ive checked into it and if over half the US didnt buy gas for 1 day, the gas companys would be close to bankrupcy!!! So Lets show them how to lower gas prices. So repost this to all your friends. We have to get the word out. Its NATIONAL DONT BUY GAS DAY!!! So repost it!!!
And yes GAS PRICES SUCK

Prayer

2005-08-03T11:02:00.000-04:00

Hey all! I need you to be praying for me! My car died last Friday. I had lunch with my mentor(through CrossRoads) and then I drove home and got their fine, but it didn't sound like it was suppose to. I was really worried and I didn't want to drive to Kohls in fear of it not getting there and all. So I asked my mom if she could take me.. thankfully she did b/c my step-dad drove it and got some fluid and it died on him. So now it is at the shop and the guy is calling around(mostly to junk yards and all) to try and get a part for my poor car :( If he is able to get part it could be around $600 or if he has to get it from a regular shop it could be up to $1000!!! So, if anyone knows anyone who selling a car for pretty cheap(like 500-800) in good condition, low milage and all, please let me know!!! I am able to use my mom's car till Sunday.... they are away, but I can only use it for work and going to Christ Community and that's it. Hope everyone is doing well! Love ya all!!!

updates

2005-07-28T00:58:00.000-04:00

Hey my wonderful friends,
I have been pretty busy. Some of you know my situation with work and all well... if ya don't them come talk to me b/c I don't feel like typing like a whole page and all.... plus it gets complicated. And I don't want to write the ending and all on here........ if ya know what I mean then you know why!!! Well, anywho! I have another job and a job interview. The job at ICING I think is falling through another story... But Kohls called me and said if I am still interested and all and I said yes I was. So I have orientation at Kohls tomorrow at 5 pm! yay! And then I have an interview at 2 for Giant. So who knows how that will go... I hope well!!! If anyone knows any families who have kids that need to be babysat let me know... I need money really bad..... Or if you know of any jobs that is pretty easy to get hired and all. Or volunteer opportunities let me know!!! Well, this is longer than I though it would be already.. so i am going to get going! ttyl!!! love ya all!

P.S. Nikki and Allen it was great to see you and it was a lot of fun having you come over to my house and go swimming. I hope you got back to Korea safely!!!! God bless! Love you both!!!

really awesome!!

2005-07-27T23:57:00.000-04:00

The Resume' of Jesus ChristAddress: Ephesians 1:20Phone: Romans 10:13Website: The Bible. Keywords: Christ, Lord, Savior and JesusHello. My name is Jesus -The Christ. Many call me Lord! I've sent you my resume' because I'm seeking the top management position in your heart. Please consider my accomplishments as set forth in my resume'.QualificationsI founded the earth and established the heavens, (See Proverbs 3:19)I formed man from the dust of the ground, (See Genesis 2:7)I breathed into man the breath of life, (See Genesis 2:7)I redeemed man from the curse of the law, (See Galatians 3:13)The blessings of the Abrahamic Covenant comes upon your life through me, (See Galatians 3:14)Occupational BackgroundI've only had one employer, (See Luke 2:49).I've never been tardy, absent, disobedient, slothful or disrespectful.My employer has nothing but rave reviews for me, (See Matthew 3:15-17)Skills Work ExperiencesSome of my skills and work experiences include: empowering the poor to be poor no more, healing the brokenhearted, setting the captives free, healing the sick, restoring sight to the blind and setting at liberty them that are bruised, (See Luke 4:18).I am a Wonderful Counselor, (See Isaiah 9:6). People who listen to me shall dwell safely and shall not fear evil, (See Proverbs 1:33).Most importantly, I have the authority, ability and power to cleanse you of your sins, (See I John 1:7-9)Educational BackgroundI encompass the entire breadth and length of knowledge, wisdom and understanding, (See Proverbs 2:6).In me are hid all of the treasures of wisdom and knowledge, (See Colossians 2:3).My Word is so powerful; it has been described as being a lamp unto your feet and a lamp unto your path, (See Psalms 119:105).I can even tell you all of the secrets of your heart, (See Psalms 44:21).Major AccomplishmentsI was an active participant in the greatest Summit Meeting of all times, (See Genesis 1:26).I laid down my life so that you may live, (See II Corinthians 5:15).I defeated the archenemy of God and mankind and made a show of them openly, (See Colossians 2:15).I've miraculously fed the poor, healed the sick and raised the dead!There are many more major accomplishments, too many to mention here. You can read them on my website, which is located at: www dot - the BIBLE. You don't need an Internet connection or computer to access my website.ReferencesBelievers and followers worldwide will testify to my divine healings, salvation, deliverance, miracles, restoration and supernatural guidanceIn SummationNow that you've read my resume', I'm confident that I'm the only candidate uniquely qualified to fill this vital! position in your heart. In summation, I will properly direct your paths, (See Proverbs 3:5-6), and lead you into everlasting life, (See John 6:47). When can I start? Time is of the essence, (See Hebrews 3:15).Send this resume' to everyone you know, you never know who may have an opening! Thanks for your help and may God! bless you!

this is sooo awesome and encouraging!!!!!!!

2005-07-25T14:46:00.000-04:00

John is the kind of guy you love to hate. He is always in a good mood and always has something positive to say. When someone would ask him how he was doing, he would reply, "If I were any better, I would be twins!"He was a natural motivator.If an employee was having a bad day, John was there telling the employee how to look on the positive side of the situation.Seeing this style really made me curious, so one day I went up and asked him, "I don't get it!You can't be a positive person all of the time. How do you do it?"He replied, "Each morning I wake up and say to myself, you have two choices today. You can choose to be in a good mood or ... you can choose to be in a bad mood.I choose to be in a good mood."Each time something bad happens, I can choose to be a victim or...I can choose to learn from it. I choose to learn from it.Every time someone comes to me complaining, I can choose to accept their complaining or... I can point out the positive side of life. I choose the positive side of life."Yeah, right, it's not that easy," I protested."Yes, it is," he said. "Life is all about choices. When you cut away all the junk, every situation is a choice. You choose how you react to situations. You choose how people affect your mood.You choose to be in a good mood or bad mood. The bottom line: It's your choice how you live your life."I reflected on what he said. Soon hereafter, I left the Tower Industry to start my own business. We lost touch, but I often thought about him when I made a choice about life instead of reacting to it.Several years later, I heard that he was involved in a serious accident, falling some 60 feet from a communications tower.After 18 hours of surgery and weeks of intensive care, he was released from the hospital with rods placed in his back.I saw him about six months after the accident.When I asked him how he was, he replied, "If I were any better, I'd be twins Wanna see my scars?"I declined to see his wounds, but I did ask him what had gone through his mind as the accident took place."The first thing that went through my mind was the well-being of my soon-to-be born daughter," he replied. "Then, as I lay on the ground, I remembered that I had two choices: I could choose to live or...I could choose to die. I chose to live.""Weren't you scared? Did you lose consciousness?" I asked.He continued, "..the paramedics were great.They kept telling me I was going to be fine.But when they wheeled me into the ER and I saw the expressions on the faces of the doctors and nurses, I got really scared. In their eyes, I read 'he's a dead man'. I knew I needed to take action.""What did you do?" I asked."Well, there was a big burly nurse shouting questions at me," said John. "She asked if I was allergic to anything. 'Yes, I replied.' The doctors and nurses stopped working as they waited for my reply. I took a deep breath and yelled, 'Gravity'."Over their laughter, I told them, "I am choosing to live. Operate on me as if I am alive, not dead."He lived, thanks to the skill of his doctors, but also because of his amazing attitude... I learned from him that every day we have the choice to live fully.Attitude, after all, is everything.Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own." Matthew 6:34.After all today is the tomorrow you worried about yesterday.You have two choices now:01. Delete this.02. Forward it to the people you care about.You know the choice I made.God Bless, and smile,it could be contagious

another job possibility!

2005-07-23T14:34:00.000-04:00

Hey all! On Saturday, I got a call from Kohls saying that they want to work their. So it is an awesome dillema!!! Please pray that everything works out. All I have to do is go take a pee test!! hehe!! That shouldn't be too hard since I drink probably 5 bottles of water a day!!!! Yucky antibiotics(and the heat)!!! Well, just wanted to update all of you!!!! Have a great weekend! love ya all!!

Hey all!!!

2005-07-23T02:32:00.000-04:00

The Wonderful Holy Spirit Looking away [from all that will distract] to Jesus, Who is the Leader and the Source of our faith... —Hebrews 12:2 Do you fellowship with your problem or with the Lord? The devil wants us to think about our problem, worry about our problem, talk about and try to reason out our problem. God desires for us to spend time with Him, talk to Him, and think about Him and His Word. Jesus is the One we are to look to in order to have our needs met. If we dwell in Him, our problem has no power over us, but if we dwell on the problem, we magnify it above Him. The more attention we give our problem, the more we feed it, the more power it has over us.For whatever issues you're going through, whether it be financial, hardship, your job, your school, anything little or anything big, just cast your care on the Lord. Fellowship with God. Don't fellowship with the problem. When you do that, the more upset you will become.The devil starts the problem rolling. The more you think, worry, reason, talk, plan, and scheme about it, the bigger it gets. If you look to Jesus, you will experience the miracle power of God as you trust in Him.Do This: Forget your problems. Don't think about them, worry about them, or talk about them. Fellowship with God instead, and you will enjoy life tremendously.

JOB

2005-07-17T16:21:00.000-04:00

I got the job!!!!!!!!!!! She called me while I was at church and I called her back at like 12:45 and one of the people who work their said the manager was busy. So I called back at like 2:05 or so and she said I passed the phone thing and so I got the job!!!!!!!! She asked me to come in at 6 tonight to meet another manager I guess a department manager or something like that!! Well, that's my news for today!!!!!!!! YAY!!!!

good news

2005-07-17T01:34:00.000-04:00

Hey all! Sorry I haven't updated much lately. I have been really busy!!! I have been helping Ruth with her house and moving in today... It has been one heck of a week!!! I have gotten yelled sorta by my step-dad about not getting a job and for sitting around and being on the computer. That's one of the reasons I have not been on the computer often. I have been just checking my email and that's about all. I have some good news. Today I went to the mall and filled out applications to 6 stores!!! KandB Toys, Yankee Candle, ICING, FYE, Hallmark and the Disney Store. Well, I filled out the ICING application right in the store. And then I told the lady I would be in the mall for a while and to call my cell phone when her manager had looked over my application. Well, the manager called me at around 3 and was like can you come in on Monday for an interview and I asked if I could come today since I was at the mall anyway. And she was like yeah at 4. So I went to the interview and she was REALLY excited. I think I might have gotten the job! I will let you all know!!!! I had to take this phone questionare(dumb thing) as part of the interview process. It was pretty easy except they asked a lot of questions. I was on the phone for probably a half hour. But anywho! They are looking for someone over the age of 18 so I definitley qualify!! hehe!! And she was just soooo excited that I came because she had an interview sheduled for 3 with another person and they never showed up. Please be praying for me the next couple of days. I really think I got this job in the bag!! so to speak... But anyway I hope all of you are doing well! I miss you all! Love ya!!!!

To all my friends!!!!

2005-07-04T16:41:00.000-04:00

I love you all! Hope you are all well!!!! MUAH!!!!!!!

think about this... You may not realize it, but it's 100% true. *PLEASE READ THIS WHOLE POST IT'S SO DAMN TRUE*

1. At least 2 people in this world love you so much they would die for you.
2. At least 15 people in this world love you in some way.
3. The only reason anyone would ever hate you is because they want to be just like you.
4. A smile from you can bring happiness to anyone, even if they don't like you.
5. Every night, SOMEONE thinks about you before they go to sleep.
6. You mean the world to someone.
7. If not for you, someone may not be living.
8. You are special and unique.
9. Someone that you don't even know exists, loves you.
10. When you make the biggest mistake ever, something good comes from it.
11. When you think the world has turned its back on you, take a look: you most likely turned your back on the world.
12. When you think you have no chance of getting what you want, you probably won't get it, but if you believe in yourself, probably, sooner or later, you will get it.
13. Always remember the compliments you received. Forget about the rude remarks.
14. Always tell someone how you feel about them; you will feel much better when they know.
15. If you have a great friend, take the time to let them know that they are great.

sorry didn't work!

2005-07-03T03:09:00.000-04:00

Hey all! I am sorry it didn't work! It was a quiz I took on myspace and I wanted to post it on here. Oh well! Have a great day! Love ya all!

Jen

no subject

2005-07-03T02:48:00.000-04:00

Don't know if this will work!!! If not oh well!!!!!

A Rosebud

2005-06-27T21:12:00.000-04:00

A young, new priest was walking with an older, more seasoned priest in the garden one day. Feeling a bit insecure about what God had for him to do, he was asking the older priest for some advice. The older priest walked up to a rose bush and handed the young priest a rosebud and told him to open it without tearing any of the petals. The young priest looked in disbelief at the older priest and was trying to figure out what a rosebud could possibly have to do with his wanting to know the will of God for his life and ministry. But, because of his great respect for the older priest, he proceeded to try and unfold the rosebud while keeping every petal intact. . It wasn't long before he realized how impossible this was to do. Noticing the young priest's inability to unfold the rosebud without tearing it, the older priest began to recite the following poem:
It is only a tiny rosebud A flower of God's design; But I cannot unfold the petals With these clumsy hands of mine. The secret of unfolding flowers Is not known to such as I. GOD opens this flower so sweetly, Then, in my hands, they die. If I cannot unfold a rosebud, The flower of God's design, Then how can I have the wisdom To unfold this life of mine? So, I'll trust in Him for leading Each moment of my day. I will look to Him for His guidance Each step of the Pilgrim's way The pathway that lies before me Only my Heavenly Father knows. I'll trust him to unfold the moments, Just as He unfolds the rose.
They say it takes a minute to find a special person, an hour to appreciate them, a day to love them, and an entire lifetime to forget them. Send this message to the people you will never forget, and remember to send it also to the person who sent it to you. It's a short message to let them know that you'll never forget them. If you don't send it to anyone, it means you're in too much of a hurry. Take the time to LIVE!!! Distance and time may separate us, but friendship will never die...

Isn't It Strange

2005-06-27T16:15:00.000-04:00

Isn't it strange how a 20 dollar bill seems like such a large amount when you donate it to church, but such a small amount when you go shopping?
Isn't it strange how 2 hours seem so long when you're at church, and how short they seem when you're watching a good movie?
Isn't it strange that you can't find a word to say when you're praying,but you have no trouble thinking what to talk about with a friend?
Isn't it strange how difficult and boring it is to read one chapter of the Bible, but how easy it is to read 100 pages of a popular novel?
Isn't it strange how everyone wants front-row-tickets to concerts or games, but they do whatever is possible to sit in the last row in Church?
Isn't it strange how we need to know about an event for Church 2-3 weeks before the day so we can include it in our agenda, but we can adjust it for other events in the last minute?
Isn't it strange how difficult it is to learn a fact about God to share it with others, but how easy it is to learn, understand,extend and repeat gossip?
Isn't it strange how we believe everything that magazines and newspapers say, but we question the words in the Bible?
Isn't it strange how everyone wants a place in heaven, but they don't want to believe, do, or say anything to get there?
Isn't it strange how we send jokes in e-mails and they are forwarded right away,but when we are going to sendmessages about God, we think about it twice before we share it with others?
IT'S STRANGE ISN'T IT? Now that you've read this repost it by today. If you don't do it not only you will deprive yourself from being blessed,but you will also do that to others who may need God in their life.better yet, repost if you believe in God.

check this out

2005-06-25T23:40:00.000-04:00

You Will Die at Age 79

79

You're pretty average when it comes to how you live...
And how you'll die as well.

What'>http://www.blogthings.com/whatagewillyoudiequiz/">What Age Will You Die?

If it doesn't work I'm sorry!!!!

update

2005-06-19T17:50:00.000-04:00

Hey all! I am sorry for not updating recently. It has been really busy. Some of you know if not most of you know I do not work at Boscov's anymore. Thats a long story in itself. But I am glad I don't have to be used as much and upset as much. I really screwed up but we all have to live and learn and learn from our mistakes, which is what I am doing and I need daily reminders of this frequently! A lot has been going on. I have been busy looking for a new job. I am meeting this lady and her kids on Wednesday in hopes of babysitting/nanny for her 2 kids. If you guys wouldn't mind praying for me this week. I really need to find a job and quick. In time I will tell all of you the reason I am not working at Boscov's, but right now I can't because of a few reasons. One, I don't feel like talking about it, two I can't talk about it to many people. If you already know please don't say anything b/c I have been kicking myself in the butt for a while now! And I am so mad at myself! But anyway! Life goes on and then you die! I will talk to you all later! Love you all! Take care!!!

PRAYER!!!!!!!!

2005-06-07T20:53:00.000-04:00

I did something incredibly stupid and now I got fired from Boscov's. I don't/can't talk about it right now. Let's just say I did something stupid and didn't know what the I was doing. I just need prayer and a miracle. Will talk later!

Nikki and Allen,
I hope you have a very safe trip to the USA! Take care and I can't wait to see you guys! Love ya!
Jen

updates

2005-06-01T16:09:00.000-04:00

Hey all! Sorry for not posting in a long while. A lot has been going on. Things are pretty good. Busy but other than that fine. I think I have already told most of you our kitchen and laundry room are done! It was kind of a pain because we couldn't really "cook". We also could not wash our clothes here because we didn't have our dish washer. We had to wash our dishes in the bathroom sink so therefore we didn't use many dishes like silverware or plates or cups. My mom had to bring our dirty clothes to the laundromat. Which was a pain for her because she is a busy lady! It took like 2-3 hrs I think to get our laundry done. And for some reason the dryer didn't dry our clothes all the way. Oh well. Nothing we can do about that. School is/has been done for 2 weeks or so now! Thank God! I already said I failed math, but you know I don't really care that much! Work is the same old thing. I get so pissed at some of the people their at times. Other times its like different and most of us get along. I don't know... all I can say is Welcome back to high school folks!!!! I swear it is just like hs with all the people talking behind your back. I know you get that any where. Well, I guess thats about it. Thank God summer is on it's way! I can't wait until my pool is open so I can go swimming!!!!!!! Love you all!

Need serious Pray.

2005-05-16T23:20:00.000-04:00

Today I was driving and I went to Main Street with two of my friends, and when we were on the way home my steering wheel started to lock up on my when I was turning so I have to like work at the turn. And this light with this battery thing is on and I don't know what that means. I am like really scared!!!!!! I don't know what is wrong. Does anyone know what this means? I am afraid that it means my car is going to die soon. Any suggestions? Hope everyone is well!

Prayers

2005-05-09T16:20:00.000-04:00

I have a few prayer requests! One is for finals this week. I had my Science one today and I have World Religion tomorrow and then Wed. (laura) and I have math and Thursday I have Abnormal Psy. which is my last final. I do not test well. Even if I study I blank out and forget everything I studied. My second request is for getting a new job. I went to The Mustard Seed today and got an application. I really want a new job. Obviously, b/c I won't have to work Sunday's which are often one of the busiest days. I think this is the perfect job right now for me. And another one is that I get rid of this cold... I don't even know how I got it. Well, thats all for now. Hope everyone is doing well!!!!! I love you all!

Shout out to Nikki

2005-05-09T16:15:00.000-04:00

HAPPY BIRTHDAY NIKKI!!!! I hope you have a wonderful birthday!!!! May God bless you today and always!!!!!!!!!!! Love you lots!!! Take care!!!! Happy B-day!

semi-busy week

2005-05-03T20:40:00.000-04:00

The next couple of weeks are going to be pretty busy I think. As I said in my previous blog I have my last week of classes this week and then finals next week. I am always busy on Thursday's as most of you know. I have class 12-3:30 on Thursday and then I go straight to CrossRoads to set-up. And I don't get home until like 11 at night sometimes. And then I will be working Friday and Saturday 3 till close. Exhausting but at least its not the shift from last week starting at 1 which is even more exhausting. Oh well. And I think I have off on Sunday since I worked this past Sunday, but who knows. I am probably going to get to see my grandmom and aunt if I have off and have dinner with them and then go to the Bridge at 7:30. I hope I will be able to see my grandmom! She is an awesome person and she spoils me... lol!!! I just felt like writing more so I blogged twice today. Well, I am running out of things to type. So I will end this now! more later! Love ya all!!!!

May already?!?!

2005-05-03T20:20:00.000-04:00

As my title says May already! I can not believe how fast this semester has gone, not that I am not happy!!!!!!!! Its been one heck of a semester let me tell you! I wish I was done, but I am not. This is my last week of classes! Praise the Lord! And then next week I have finals. I have a question/ want opinion on something. One of my professors he invites his classes to The Winner's Circle next Friday. Do you think that is right for a teacher to do this? He's a really cool guy and very relaxed in his teaching. Let me know what you guys think. My weekend was pretty good. I worked most of it. I went to the Bridge on Sunday. I am loving the Bridge as always! Nothing is really new with me right now! I will talk to you all later! Love ya!

Weekend

2005-04-26T18:30:00.000-04:00

Hey all! My weekend was pretty good! I worked on Friday 1:30 till close and then I like crashed after that! I was totally drained and tired it was not even funny! I had Saturday and Sunday off from work!! It was so much fun. I have not had off both days in like such a while!!!!! I just relaxed a lot of it. Saturday morning I went to my church and saw some of my moms CCD class get their 1st Communion which was sooooo cute! Their were two girls I knew and both of them because I have babysat them and one of them lives in my neighborhood. And then I hung out with my friend Katrin and her boyfriend and we went out to eat at Appittites on Main and then we went back to her house and played Dutch Blitz and her parents were watching a movie called Cellcular it was a creepy movie but it was pretty good. And then I went home around 11:30. On Sunday I didn't really do much. I worked on math and my math test. Bridge went two services which is really neat. But it was confusing also because we weren't sure when to go in and all because the Bridge band was still playing. But it was really neat! The only thing I really didn't like is that we get out late and then we are very limited to were to go out to grab a bite to eat. So that was my weekend! It was fun but it was more relaxing than anything. I think I definitley needed a relaxing weekend. I will talk to you all later! Love ya all!

nothing new

2005-04-21T02:41:00.000-04:00

Hey my wonderful and beautiful friends! I just felt like typing a little sumthin for yas!!!! hehehe! No, I am not on anything! I just felt like talking/typing that way! I don't have that much time because I am at school and my next class starts in like 20 minutes. As my title says there's nothing really new happening with me. My kitchen is finished PRAISE THE LORD!!!!!!!!! No more drilling and banging!!!! YIPPY!!!! The semester is almost done thank God! I can't wait until summer! I am soooo tired of doing everything school related. I am soo tired right now. But oh well! I am almost done. Hope everyone has a wonderful day and a wonderful weekend! If anyone is available to do something this weekend let me know!!!! I actually have off Saturday and Sunday!!!!! Well ttyl!!! I hope to see some of you at CrossRoads tonight!!! If not, I will be thinking of you! Love you all! Take care!!!!!

my weekend and Bridge

2005-04-11T23:26:00.000-04:00

Hey my loving friends! This past week and weekend have definitley been a trial!!!! I had to work and it was not fun!!! On Friday I actually was suppose to have off, but because of my other co-worker having a cyst in her leg she is not able to work for a while. So needless to say I had to work for her. It wouldnt have been as big a deal, but its like every time I am scheduled off for some reason or another I always have to work. It was crazy busy and of course I was by myself for the night and it sucks because it would bec0me busy sporadically! Then, I was hoping to have to work on Sunday and then I was like no I don't want to work because I had a 5 page paper due today(Monday). As it turns out, I was not scheduled to work! Praise the Lord! I was going to go to Christ Community Church at 10:30 but that never happened b/c I know myself well enough to get down to buisness and to start writing/typing my paper. It's a good thing I did not go because it took a LONG time to write it. I always wasn't feeling up to sitting b/c I had cramps and all so I was feeling a little nause. I worked on my paper from 10 till about 4:45(with breaks in between. I was debating about going to the Bridge and I was like I really need/want to go and be in fellowship with other Christians my age and with people who love me for me and to worship the greatest thing that has ever happened to me!!!! I went and boy was I glad I went!!!! Charles Deza and Michelle and there band sang/performed and they did an awesome job! The sermon was on sex. I was like ummm ok then! But it was interesting. Phil makes everything funny and it was funny how he said stuff. Then at the end this lady and guy named Adam told us their testimony. Adam's was really awesome! It hit me in a way that I could relate to some of what he has gone through. He was sexually abused as a child(teen not sure) and I was also. I know I haven't told most of you but I am at the point where I just don't care anymore. I need to surrender it to God in order for my to really be healed. And Adam also said how he felt like a failure at times well I know I feel like that also and it hurts sometimes. While he was speaking he got choked up a couple of times and he was tearing up and it made me start crying. I have a tendency to cry when others are crying... God was definitley speaking through him for many reasons and I think one was to help me trust him. There was an awesome worship time afterward and after the first song on the second set Adam and the other girl got baptized.. It was awesome. After the worship was over we stayed a little while. I felt funny. I wasn't myself. And others noticed and I was like Im fine, im just tired. We went to UNO's and I wasn't really "there". more in a minute.........

continued Bridge....

2005-04-11T14:11:00.000-04:00

While we were deciding on where to go and all, I didn't really want to go to Uno's. I wasn't acting my normal self. I am not sure what was wrong with me, but I had a heavy heart and I was just thinking about a lot of stuff especially about what Adam said and Jeff dying and life. I don't know why but I wasn't really in the mood for pizza.. I have never been there before so I didn't know they had other stuff so yeah. While we were at Uno's I wasn't feeling very well(cramps and finger hurt -blood blister), but I stayed b/c I didn't feel like going home and working on the paper just yet. So we stayed till close to 11 o'clock and then I went home. At the restruant I was still not myself. And everyone knew it too. I am like an open boook! So I just said i was ok, just tired which was partly true. Then we went our seperate ways. I then went home and worked till I couldn't see straight pretty much. I finally got done at 2 am. Man was I tired!!!!! While I was finishing writing my paper I was talking to people on AIM and one of those people was Lynette and I was telling her about how Adam's words impacted me and how I was sexually abused as a kid and all. She was very caring and loving and it helped me even though its kind of hard to tell over an instant message. She said something I told her a little bit ago that really helped me! She said that God is carrying me now and he has been and that I have to trust in him(in a nut shell). Although, Lynette and most of my other friends don't get to hang out that often we still have great talks and relate better to each other. Lynette I love you babe! Thanks again! Probably if I hadn't been talking online, I might have gotten done writing my paper earlier, but I was kind of having a writers block. What more can you say about the weather????? And it had to be 5 FULL pages and if it wasn't 5 full pages we would get an automatic F! How unfair is that?????? Oh well! But I finally finished it and it is turned in now! I didn't want to make this soooooo long but sometimes it just happens and you can't do anything about it!!! As Becca said this is a place were we can just lay out our hearts pretty much and I definitley agree because I can't tell most people about my life in person... sometimes I can and I am getting better talking with others about problems I face and all. Well, Im going to go to bed before I fall asleep at the computer desk!!!!! lol! I love you all!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

PRAYERS!!!!

2005-04-03T20:48:00.000-04:00

Hey to all my friend! Last night(not sure what time) a lady from my work, her house had caught on fire and her mom didn't make it. Please be praying for her family. The lady I work with her name is Christina and she was really close with her mom. They lived together in Philadelphia. Boscov's is going to be raising money for Christina. I think I am going to talk to Scott and see if we can raise money also. Christina was working last night and she does not drive so she has to take the bus. Sometimes she will leave at 9:15 instead of 9:45 and I am not sure what time she left last night(i wasn't working then) but she probably got home right in the middle of everthing. I heard the she has a sister that lives near here, but they do not get along. She was suppose to work today but obviously she didn't work. It is soooo sad. Please keep Christina in your prayers! And don't take life for granted! God may just have other plans for your life!!!!!! I love you all!

Friday

2005-04-01T13:11:00.000-05:00

Hey all, again I am sorry for not posting in a while! I think I think others blogs faster than I post on my own!!! Thats really sad! There's not a whole lot going on with me. Our kitchen and laundry room are almost finished. When you see it you will be like what the heck?! It looks totally totally different!!!!!! They are putting up the tile/blacksplash I think its also called. And then they are pretty much finished!!!! There isnt anything else really going on right now!! So I will talk to you all later! Hope everyone is doing well! Love you lots!

stinky days

2005-03-23T00:35:00.000-05:00

Hey to all my friends! Hope everyone is doing well! I am once again sorry for not updating frequently as I use to, but with people working at my house it is kind of difficult..... not to mention today was a stinky day literally!!!!! About 9 this morning my cat(toonces) gets sprayed by a skunk and so my mom brought toonces in through the front door to the back porch because she thought he was dying because his eyes where watering and he was foaming at the mouth.... He wasn't dying! He was just reacting to being sprayed directly in the face!!!! So, not to mention it stunk up the WHOLE house and it still smells in some places! Its not fun! I was really nausuated by the smell this morning. I was like I have to get out of this house. Our kitchen has been making progress!!! A lot of the cabinets are in and it looks more like a kitchen... Once it is finished I will let you guys come see it if you want to... the cabinets are made by the amish... our whole kitchen and laundry room will be done by the amish!!! Very good quality! Update on the boy situation..... if you guys have been wondering nothing really has been happening with that.... We basically have been talking and thats it. I am just trying to get to know him and be his friend first and if God wants something else to happen between us He will allow it!!!! I am going to get going now because let me tell you I am EXHAUSTED!!!!! I went to bed at 1:30 and got up at 6:30 then 7:30 and then for good at 9. So I am falling asleep at the computer! ttfn! Lots of love!

Good news

2005-03-12T00:35:00.000-05:00

My dad is doing great!!!! Praise the Lord!!!! He had two doctors appointments. One was with the surgeon and that was Monday and then Tuesday was with his cardiologist. The surgeon said that he is able to drive short distances..... And it has only been a month!!!!!!! How awesome is that??? So everything is going really well with that! Our kitchen is still a mess but they were able to get the floor down in 3 days(Wed., Thursday and Friday). I am not sure when it will actually be done. But I can tell you right now I am not liking this...... I going out a lot more because of it. And I have been getting up at 8:30 compared to 10:00 everyday and then I just get sooo wiped out from the day. They said it might take longer than they thought. My parents aren't going to Mrtyle Beach this year and they always go. And so everything is messed up now! I was going to have a friend come over. Oh well. Its not like I can't still do something..... Anyway that kind of frustrated me when I found out about that, but ya know it makes sense because if he needs to rest they will have to go back to their room and just relax. It is a golfing trip. So anywho on with more stuff. I am going to have dinner with Brad which is the guy who likes me from work. We are going to go to the food court. I think that is really good first "date"/getting to know someone. I will let you guys know what happens and all. Please pray for me... I have never been on a date! Well, ttfn! Love you alls!!!!!

sad times...

2005-03-07T15:05:00.000-05:00

Hey all! This weekend one of my mom's co-workers has passed away. He has been sick for a little while and then he died on Saturday. He was at the Chester County Hospital. His name is Jay. Please pray for his family. And also for my mom's work because he was their for a while. Two people went to visit him like 2 weeks ago or so and they said he didn't like that great. The doctor's didn't know what was causing him to be sick. He is in a better place now. I don't know if the doctor's figured out what was wrong or not. Well.... I guess he lived a good life. He died at age 70. Thats all for now folks.... hehe

need advice

2005-03-05T00:00:00.000-05:00

Hey all! Sorry again that I haven't written in a while. I am just so busy with school and all. I do check everyone's everyday though I just find it hard to write everyday sometimes. I really need your advice!!! I just found out today at work from another co-worker that another co-worker is interested in me. I don't know how to feel. He has told her(like two weeks ago) that I am pretty and my eyes are pretty and I had gotten a make-over from the cosmetics person one time and he had said i looked really pretty. As I have told some of you before I have never been in a relationship with anyone and I don't know what to say or do. We including the one who told me are probably going to go out to dinner one time and all. I guess this is God's timing for me? I don't know. I am kind of nervous. I know who he is and I talk to him and he is nice. If it is God's will for my life right now, than He will allow me to start a relationship with him. Do any of you have any advice for me? I will let you know updates on this.

updates

2005-02-25T17:25:00.000-05:00

Hey all! I think everyone hasn't been updating there blogs that frequently! It is a very busy time of the year right now with school and work and everything. So I am sorry(also) for not posting in a while. I have a ever said that I don't like snow and I am tired of it. Things at home are rough right now. And they will just get even rougher. We are getting our kitchen re-done. We have a new refidgerator(sp?) and we just put everything in their today. My mom has already been taking the stuff in the kitchen and put them in boxes and put them downstairs. Everything will be a mess pretty soon. They start on Monday. It was suppose to be last week but they had to push it back another week which is actually really good with Kevin recovering and all. Kevin is doing very well. He has been out and about picking out stoves and all. He gets tired but he's doing really good. He has been using those wheel chair things when they go out to look at stuff for the kitchen. He had a doctors appointment on Tuesday and they said everything looks good. So, that is definitley a praise!!! Please continue to pray for us. We will have a lot of people coming in and out of our house for the next 3 weeks probably. But the end result will be really cool!!!! My brothers are coming tomorrow and moving the old fridge down to the basement and move the kitchen table and do other lifting stuff!! yippy! No more eating in the kitchen. We will be eating in our living room which has the new refridgerator(sp?) and its also were our fusball table is... I have to work tonight 5-9:45 and then I was suppose to have off tomorrow but last Sunday my manager called and asked me if I could work 12-6 and I said ok whatever...... Not that I really want to, but the extra money will be nice. I am also probably going to get yelled at tomorrow(yippy) not..... Stacey our manager said not to open coats to Angie last Wednesday and then to me last Friday she tells me I am working in coats and Angie was in dresses. I told Angie Friday night and she gets really ticked off and tells me to call her on her cell so I did. And she tells me that Stacey told her not to open coats. Well, I come in Sunday morning at 9:30 and one of the store managers comes down and says that angie has to work in Petites at 3:45(she came in at 11)... So we were like we are not opening coats since she had to go to Petites at 3:45... 4 hours of having coats open?? thats kind of dumb to have it open. This past Monday Angie gets yelled at for not opening it by another co-worker.... big long story... Needless to say I am not very happy going in today or tomorrow. Talk to you all later!!!! Love you all! Hope you are doing well!

math problems

2005-02-17T00:45:00.000-05:00

As most of you know, I do not like math at all. I am struggling again with Math for Edu. majors. I am starting worry that I am not in the right field of study. I know I can be wrong, but I don't know. Please pray for me for this. I am going to be praying also. I failed a test I took tonight and I am so pissed at myself. I don't test well, but that's not really an excuse. Oh well. My teacher was like maybe you should take it during a class that has it twice a week that way your not just looking at it Wednesday night and then again like Tuesday night and Wednesday during the day. That might be what I need to do. I wish I could have the same teacher I had last semester but she can't teach this... she's not certified to teach anything higher than 060 which is like pre-algebra. So ya.... that is my concern right now. Update on my dad: He is doing very well! He got the mail on Tuesday. He has been walking around. Doing computer work for his buisness(sp). We have a outpatient nurse that comes and checks on him she came Sunday and a different nurse came Tuesday and then the same nurse is coming Friday I think. So far she has said everything is great. And that it is a miracle that they found the anerysm!! We already knew that though!!!! hehe! When I know something new I will let you guys know! I love you all and thank you sooooo much for praying for us. We really really appreciate it!

Valentine's Day

2005-02-14T18:45:00.000-05:00

Happy Valentine's Day to all of you! It's another Valentine's by myself... oh well! Guess Im not special enough! lol! Just kidding! I know I am special but not in that way to most guys. I guess that God doesn't want me to have any relationships with guys yet and that's fine, but it does get a little lonesome and tiring. I am going to a Valentine's Day party. This will be interesting..... I have never been to a V-day party besides elementary school(miss those days hehehe). I know 3 people who have their birthday's today. So Happy Birthday Becca, Mom, and my Aunt Moe(dad's sister)!!!!! It is so hard to find cards that are both Valentine's and Birthday all in one. In the Giant shopping center where Hallmark is I found 3 cards that were both and they weren't that good. I am not that fond of V-day either. I think it is a weird day. Most couples are going to do stuff that they don't think they will do b/c it is Valentine's Day. Or that they wouldn't normally do...... But yeah... I guess I will feel like this until someone sweeps me off my feet! Well, for all the love birds have a great time together! And everyone have a Happy Valentines Day! Happy birthday Becca!!!!! Love you all!

great news!!!!!!!

2005-02-12T13:45:00.000-05:00

I have great news!!!! My dad is home from the hospital!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! YAY!!!!!! Please pray for a fast recovery and that he will continue to get better everyday! He didn't sleep that well last because they brought another guy into the same room and the guy had a rough night and was doing to good. Please pray also for my brother Kevin becuase he can be the biggest pain in the you know what. He doesn't clean up after himself or if he does it is like much later and he just does whatever he pleases! My mom was at the hospital all day yesterday and when she came home at like 9:30 10 o'clock there was dishes and stuff in the sink and my mom had to do them. Pray that he will be helpful during our dad's recovery. He is staying longer b/c of his surgery. He was going to moving out of the house in to Conshohoken area. Because that is near where he teaches. Well, i hope all of you have a wonderful weekend! I know I am. I got to see my friends last night and we had dinner together. And today I am going over to friends house and hanging out with them! Love you guys!