For all of you!! love you my friends!

To: YOU
Date: Today
From: God
Subject: YOURSELF
Reference: LIFE
I am God. Today I will be handling all of your problems. Please remember that I do not need your help. If life happens to deliver a situation to you that you cannot handle, do not attempt to resolve it. Kindly put it in the SFGTD (something for God to do) box. All situations will be resolved, but in My time, not yours. Once the matter is placed into the box, do not hold onto it by worrying about it. Instead, focus on all the wonderful things that are present in your life now.
- If you find yourself stuck in traffic; Don't despair. There are people in this world for whom driving is an unheard of privilege.
- Should you have a bad day at work; Think of the man who has been out of work for years.
- Should you despair over a relationship gone bad; Think of the person who has never known what it's like to love and be loved in return.
- Should you grieve the passing of another weekend; Think of the woman in dire straits, working twelve hours a day, seven days a week to feed her children.
- Should your car break down, leaving you miles away from assistance; Think of the paraplegic who would love the opportunity to take that walk.
- Should you notice a new gray hair in the mirror; Think of the cancer patient in chemo who wishes she had hair to examine.
- Should you find yourself at a loss and pondering what is life all about, asking what is my purpose? Be thankful. There are those who didn't live long enough to get the opportunity.
- Should you find yourself the victim of other people's bitterness, ignorance, smallness or insecurities; Remember, things could be worse. You could be one of them!
- Should you decide to send this to a friend; Thank you, you may have touched their life in ways you will never know!

life is looking up...

Hey friends! I am doing better then I was before.... I had kind of a crappy weekend but it got better.... I think it is manily me that is the problem... I always let things get to me and then it "floods" my mind. And then I can't get it out of my head. And I have found that I don't go to God first.. I usually ask people to pray for me not that thats wrong but I should be looking to God through everything first and foremost! I love going to the Bridge and just being in fellowship with other Christians especially girls!!! I am meeting so many great new people!! I am starting really forgive myself for all that has happened to me... I have totally stopped talking to that guy I was saying who was talking sexually to me. I had had enough of him and it built up to the point where I couldn't completely function with thoughts of hurting myself.... because of all that stuff he said and just with everything that was happening... I feel soooooo much better not talking to him. He really pissed me off and just put me in a bad mood. Especially last Thursday when he called me while in the hospital and talked for like a straight 10 minutes without me talking and all.... and I was with a friend. And I said that and he said well ya could have told me that! And hung up.. I was like thats it!! Turns out he's not having the surgery now b/c he got into a fight with the doctors and actually got kicked out of the hospital!!!!! haha!!! don't know how that happened but yeah! Sorry i am liking switching colors when I write my blogs! I hope you enjor the colors! heeeheee!! God is definitley stretching and growing me!!! Sunday and today have been good days for me!! Today I worked at 10-6:30 and it wasn't too bad... kinda busy and then slow at times... I didn't really have any negative thoughts today which is good b/c I was just happy and not really caring about anything.... I like most of the people I work with including the managers.... I like to joke around and stuff... make it a little fun/interesting... My managers say I am the "Credit Queen"... so far this month I have opened 14 credit apps for customers.... in one day I opened 8!!! Today I opened 3. It makes me feel good when I get them b/c they get really happy and all.... and they are not down our throats.... lol!! I went to have dinner with Ruth at her house with Sophia and another of ruth's friends.... we had tacos and stuff... its was gooooooodddddd!!!! I love taco salads!! She gave me some for lunch tomorrow!!! And now I am really really happy!!!!! So yeaah!!! Hope all is well with everyone!! Love ya all!!!!

Hey my beautiful friends!!!! God is just awesome and amazing!!! I am just sooo happy happy happy!!!! I obviously can't contain myself right now!!! haha! Although the first part of my weekend wasn't the best it ended great!!! Im alive and well!!!! I have God, I have family, I have friends.... what more could a girl ask for?! Bridge tonight at Kerr Park was auhmazing!!!!!!!!!!!! Really really really really awesome! Just what I needed!!! There was a slight breeze and it was God telling me that He was there and wrapping his arms around me and telling me that everything is and will be ok and to trust in Him!!!!!! There was also a bird flying and just flew higher and higher in the sky! One thing I have been praying about is to see God in the small things and to be open to Him showing me himself! Well how about that?! During church at CFC this morning and at Bridge when I close my eyes during worship I see a girl dancing her heart out for Jesus! I am just sooo excited for what God has for me this next year and the years to come.... I just need to learn to trust Him with EVERYTHING and all parts of my life and not "beat around the bush" and take back my regrets and all..... wow that was a long run on... haha oh well!! im not in English class.. heheh!!! but yeah! God is awesome! I love him with my whole being!!!! God bless you all!!!!!!!!! GO EAGLES!! THEY WON BABY!!!! hahaha sorry!!!

update on my blog from earlier!!!!!

Just a quick update from my blog earlier today.... I am doing better than I was earlier.... I know I definitley overreact a lot of the time. I just get so over worked about differenet things.. I spent from 5-10 reading my bible at Barnes & Noble..... I actually go there a lot to read and just relax. It is so calming there. I love it! I am at peace right now. I am thankful for everything that I have. Most people don't have anything and I have a roof over my head, a computer which I can have in my room, a comfortable bed, a fan, A/C, a small flat screen tv, a cell phone, a nice car, good friends, clothing on my back... and I could go on and on!! This day has got me thinking more about others instead of myself... yes it started out about me.. but I shouldn't be worrying about anything!! Here is a verse in which I really like especially right now!! Philippians 4:6-7 Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. 7.And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus. How awesome is that?! We don't have to worry about anything!! God is sooo awesome!!! My heart is happy and light!!! I don't know why I was so dramatic... I just got wrapped up in everything!! God bless you all! Love you all!!

not doing too good....

My life right now is a roller coaster... thats the best way to explain it! I will be fine for a while maybe a two days or so but yeah... Then I just am not myself... I hear someone say something or someone talks to me and then I start degrading myself and really beating myself up over most of the time nothing! Then I will talk with a friend and it helps and then bam again the cycle begins again! Why why why why?!?!?! I don't know and I don't understand! I wish someone would just come and kill me right now and put me out of my misery! Im sorry I am talking like this right now but it is the way I feel right now. I can't stand hearing people fight about anything and then put me in the arguement oh heck no!!!!!! Im sorry I just can't handle anything right now... I feel like I need to run away or something.. I don't have anywhere to go and I don't have the money or anything... i need a break from life... im so tired... i just want everything to stop!! i dont want/can't pretend everything is ok. when it is not!! My world, my everything is crumbling down!! I just needed some place to right down everything.... im sure in a day or two ill be better than i am right now!

why is life so hard and complicated!?

I am soo tired and being hurt and "abused" if ya wanna say..... I've just had enough of this life right now... don't really know whats going on. I am livin the moment to moment and thinking what the heck am I doing? nothing.. I don't know what to do.... I feel all I can do is write and cry if I need to... I have a hard time talking about my life... I'd rather be helping someone else than dealing with my own life and problems....Maybe that is good but I don't know. I feel that I am not that important... I don't know... I am at a stage of "i don't know's".... well I will write more later... gotta get lunch ready and have breakfast... and go to work :(.....